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365442 No.854  

The remakes of the first two visual novels have been analyzed. The changed lines are few slight adjustments as with the third visual novel and have been documented on my blog:
http://axypb.net/2012/03/19/changed-lines-in-a-kiss-for-the-petals/
http://axypb.net/2012/03/18/changed-lines-in-my-dear-prince/

I would like a translator to review the lines and retranslate them if necessary, especially for My Dear Prince, which is more extensively changed and no longer maintained by its original translator.

>> No.855  

My Dear Prince

S001
検索結果1秒。=Search took 1 second.
検索結果1件。=One search result.

S002
私のアソコは紗良と私の蜜で、あっという間に濡れそぼってしまった。=That part was dripping before I knew it with nectar from Sara and me.
私のアソコは紗良の唾液と私の蜜で、あっという間に濡れそぼってしまった。=That part was dripping before I knew it with Sara's saliva and my nectar.

S010
私の様子を怪訝そうに見ながら、私たちは学校を後にする。=She looked at me dubiously while we got out of school.
私の様子を怪訝そうに見る紗良と、学校を後にする。=Sara shot me a dubious glance as we left the school.

S011
私も同じ事をして、露わになった蜜に触れた。=I did the same thing and touched the exposed nectar.
私も同じ事をして、露わになった秘苑に触れた。=I did the same thing and touched her exposed private place.

知識では知っているけれど、言ったことも聞いたこともない恥ずかしい言葉で顔が熱くなる。=Although I know about them, my face burned over the embarrassing words I never said nor heard before.
自分が言ってしまった恥ずかしい言葉で顔が熱くなる。=My face burned over the embarrassing things I was saying.

S015
私は紗良に夜が明ける前に起こされた。=Sara woke me up before day broke.
私は紗良に目覚まし時計が鳴る前に起こされた。=Sara woke me up before the alarm.

眼鏡と髪型は見慣れたものだとしても……=Even though I was used to how I looked without glasses and with my hair untied...
眼鏡を取った顔と三つ編を解いた髪型は見慣れたものだとしても……=Even though I was used to how I looked without glasses and with my hair unbraided...

Kiss for the petals:
S001
「そろそろ3年生のお姉さまがたは、引退の次期ですものねぇ」=All of the third-year student leaders will be gradually retiring over the next term, as usual.
「そろそろ3年生のお姉さまがたは、引退の時期ですものねぇ」=It's become the time where third-year students step down.

S010
そこには、立派な門がそびえ立っていた。=There, an elegant gate stood, looming before us.
そこには、素敵なマンションが建っていた。=There, a magnificent condo stood.

S013
合わさった肉の愛だから、行き場を失った愛液が卑猥な音を立てて飛び散っていた。=With our flesh joined in love, obscene sounds and splashes of wetness flew about.
合わさった肉の間から、行き場を失った愛液が卑猥な音を立てて飛び散っていた。=From the place our flesh joined obscene sounds and splashes of wetness flew about.

S014
わたしのアソコは恥ずかしいぐらいに密を溢れさせ、股の間だをグッショリと濡らしている。=I was overflowing down there a shameful amount, and the space between my thighs was soaking wet.
わたしのアソコは恥ずかしいぐらいに蜜を溢れさせ、股の間をグッショリと濡らしている。=My nectar was overflowing down there a shameful amount, and the space between my thighs was soaking wet.



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