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File: 2013-05-30_122550.png -(1036083 B, 806x625) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
1036083 No.2773  

http://wiki.yuriproject.net/wiki:michael_no_otome_tachi

This is a translation project for the full release of the visual novel. Proger_XP has gracefully updated ArcTool with full support for this visual novel. Download this special build and select "Hanamika" for the encryption.
http://www.mediafire.com/download/mlq46si847j77ja/ArcTool_11D.zip

Due to the large amount of scripts for this visual novel, I've packaged the UTF files for convenience.
http://www.mediafire.com/download/42tbw7bnmuytd9z/HANAMIKA_UTF.zip

>> No.2774  
File: 2013-05-30_122606.png -(1040529 B, 806x625) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
1040529

Note the different character limit. The limits are 53 characters for the first line and for dialogue, and 55 characters for lines after the first in narrative.

>> No.2776  
File: 2013-05-30_122554.png -(1002677 B, 806x625) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
1002677

The character limit for chapter titles is 35 characters. More characters can fit, but the line will wrap over.

>> No.2781  

No comments on this?

>> No.2782  

wow, not gonna lie, this project is gonna take some time to finish....
small question, when chosen the route, is there an option to take other route after the route you have chosen earlier finish or do you have to start from the beginning. or does it just continues to next route automatically?

>> No.2783  

start from the beginning or from where you saved when you choose the route for the game

>> No.2866  

Anyone know which are the right choices to make for easy reference?

>> No.2869  

i went through and i think i found the sequence of answers up till chapter 30. but do bear in mind that i cannot read japanese so i don't know what the answers mean and also i determined the chapters by change in background music (which i think is pretty accurate)
i believe that there are total of 5 questions to be answered before splitting and they are in this order
up, up, up, down, up
please, do correct me if i am wrong.

>> No.2870  

*inaccurate

>> No.3403  

how do i usethe arctool on the utf files. everytime iuse them it says uknown archive format

>> No.3404  

anyone know of a good translation tool to play eroge that is stil untranslated, atlas agth and TA all seem to have problems.

>> No.3472  

Anyone translating this? Or need any translators? I'll help!

>> No.3486  

>>3472
You can begin translating the scripts posted in the wiki. Feel free to ask any questions regarding the use of this build of ArcTool linked in the first post. Thank you very much for your support.

>> No.3487  

Awesome I'll begin translation on this then :D

>> No.3559  

god i love you guys honestly.

>> No.3624  

So how's it going?

>> No.3789  

So this is dead? ;-;

>> No.3795  

Since this is the largest Sono Hanabira so far as it features every couple seen so far plus another new one, it's going to take a while to finish it.
Maybe that's why the crew is focusing on Lily Platinum and Sweet Grown-up Kisses before this one.
But that's just me.

>> No.3797  

I'm actually a bit happy this project hasn't really startet yet.
I just startet with my first japanese lessons in "Primsleur" and "Human Japanese".
So Depending on my progress I might actually make it in time and contribute a few lines ^^

>> No.3878  

I plan to begin translating the scripts in the next day or two. I'll upload each translated file to the wiki as I complete them.
This will be my first time working on one of the visual novels, so I don't know how quickly I'll be able to progress. I'm hoping to be able to complete roughly one file every couple of days, however.

>> No.3881  

I wanted to get off to a good start, so I finished the entire first file tonight.
I won't be able to keep up this pace though. I think working at my normal pace each one will probably take me 2-3 days.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s001

>> No.3908  

The second file is done.
I haven't done any proofreading.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s002

This one has some wordplay.

Risa overhears Nanami call Yuuna Ero-otome and wonders to herself if that's some kind of strawberry (the joke being that Ama-otome is also a type of strawberry.)

I translated it as "Dirt eagle" (a mishearing of "Dirty girl") with Risa wondering if it's some kind of bird.

>> No.3916  

>>3908
Ah, great to see you're making fast progress!
Thanks for taking the time to translate.

>> No.3927  

#3 is done.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s003

I'm sure it's going to require some proofreading and a little cleanup. This chapter was longer than the other two, so by the time I got to the halfway point last night and the end tonight, I was having trouble concentrating. Those two areas may have some silly mistakes in them because of that.

>> No.3929  

>>3881
<4634> そして何でも、そつなくこなしてしまう。=She handle anything flawlessly.
I am not a proof reader, but this sentence is really off. Better phrasing for 'handle' could be "She can handle anything flawlessly." "She handles anything flawlessly."

>> No.3930  

>>3929
That was a typo. I probably meant to write "She could handle anything flawlessly."

Like I said, I haven't proofread these. Consider them rough drafts rather than finished products.
I've just been uploading them as I complete each one so people can have access to them.

I'm planning to review the first three chapters tonight and tweak dialogue and clean them up as necessary.

>> No.3931  

>>3930
I've proofread and made dialogue revisions to the first three chapters. They should all be in a pretty good state now.

>> No.3932  

Script 4 is done.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s004

This one I did proofread and revise before I uploaded it.

>> No.3933  

>>3930

I'll be helping with the proofreading/TLC (and hopefully some translating in the future), so if proofreading takes a lot of time from your translating, you can just go ahead and finish scripts. I'll be helping with proofreading. o/

>> No.3934  

>>3933
It doesn't take that much time. I prefer to proofread them myself anyway since I usually end up revising the wording in a lot of places after I make a second pass.

Please feel free to check the uploaded files again though and offer suggestions or look for things I may have missed.

>> No.3938  

>>3934 Roger that.

>> No.3948  

>>3927
This line from chapter 3 has given me some grief.
「どこか無縁よ、そんなにキレイな顔をしているのだから、可愛いものに興味があったって……」

The text reads どこか but to me, the audio sounds closer to が instead of か, and also the vocal inflection seems to break it up as two words instead of just one. It also seems to make more sense in context for it to be どこが. Regardless of the exact meaning, I feel like I get the general gist of what's being said, and have translated accordingly, but I thought I would mention it here.

>> No.3949  

Chapter 5 is complete.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s005

Or "Script 5." I'm not sure of the appropriate way to refer to these.

>> No.3950  

>>3948 If I were to translate this line, I'd translate "どこか無縁よ" as "What do you mean 'no attachments'?" since Miya (right?) seems to be mocking her for saying that line.

Maybe translating it as "indifferent/indifference" instead of 'attachment' would make the flow easier?

Although I am making these suggestions I haven't really checked the script or the previous script so I'm just basing from the line you gave and the ones before it.

>> No.3951  

>>3950
This line is spoken by Risa, in response to Miya saying she has no attachment to cute things (or that they hold no importance to her).

From her tone of voice it seems apparent that Risa isn't buying it.

>I'd translate "どこか無縁よ" as "What do you mean 'no attachments'?"

This was my first thought as well. "In what way are you not attached?"
But that's where I began to second guess myself, because that seems like it would need to be どこが instead of どこか.

どこが means "In what way," while どこか means "In some way."

>> No.3953  

>>3951 Hmm, that is indeed troubling. Do you have a save file somewhere near that part or the start of that chapter? I'll take a look at it later after getting home from work.

>> No.3954  
File: GAME05.txt -(214862 B, 0x0) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

>>3953
Thank you for looking at this.

Here is a save file a little before this exchange takes place (change the extension to .SAV).
I wasn't sure how far back to go, so I just started at the beginning of the scene.

Also, you may already be aware of this, but I just recently discovered you can fast-forward through the dialogue by holding the ctrl button on your keyboard. It's a little more convenient than using the in-game "skip" option because you can just let go of the button when you want to stop.

>> No.3956  

>>3953
And I just had another thought.
Miya asserts that she's 無縁 (isolated/unconcerned with) cute things.
Risa comes back with どこか無縁よ, perhaps saying that Miya is indeed separated somehow, but not in the way she claims.
どこか無縁よ、
可愛いものに興味があったって…

Maybe...
"You're disconnected... from your interest in cute things."

I'm not sure.

>> No.3957  

Wow guys, ur on fire haha, keep that! i'll be cheering u!

>> No.3958  

>>3956
This has officially become an obsession.

Now I'm thinking this is Risa being her tsundere self (yes spellchecker, tsundere is a word).
At first I thought she sounded angry, but now I think it might be defensiveness.

The translation below is overly literal to emphasize meaning rather than to sound natural.

Miya:
そういうものとは、わたくしは無縁だから
Literally: "I am unconnected to those sorts of things."

Risa:
どこか無縁よ、
Literally: "In some ways unconnected."
My interpretation: "(I am also) in some ways unconnected (to those sorts of things)."

Risa:
そんなにキレイな顔をしているのだから、可愛いものに興味があったって……
Literally: "Because (your) face is that pretty, (I thought) there was an interest in cute things..."

Altogether:
Miya:
"These are of no concern to me."

Risa:
"Me neither, really. I just figured with a face that pretty you'd be into cute things..."

>> No.3959  

>>3950
>>3951
I also think that's it. I listened to the line and the か sounds like a question (I'm not sure, but if it's "どこか (somewhere)" the か would sound shorter and lower/same pitch?). Like this: 無縁?どこですかよ?!

>> No.3960  

>>3959
Since all three of us had the same initial interpretation, I'm probably just overthinking it.
I have managed to find some other examples of どこか used to mean "where" (どこ+か rather than the single word どこか), so that's probably what it is in this case.

I've just made the どこか・どこが and 何か・何が mistake before, and didn't want to make it again here.

>> No.3961  

>>3960 >>3959
Okay, I might have gotten it. It might've been どこが無縁よ. So the lines could be translated as

> 「女の子らしいとか、可愛いとか……そういうものとは、わたくしは無縁だから」= Cute or girlish things... I am unconcerned with these./I have no interest in such things.
> 「どこか無縁よ、そんなにキレイな顔をしているのだから、可愛いものに興味があったって……」 = Who are you fooling? With a face as pretty as yours, you'd have to be into cute things...

^ Or something like that. Risa does that kind of sarcasm often throughout the game, until the Atelier sequel.

>> No.3962  

Chapter 6 is done.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s006

And chapter 3 has been slightly revised based on the discussion above.

>> No.3971  

Chapter 7.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s007

>> No.3975  

Chapter 8.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s008

>> No.3977  

>>3971
The chapter title "If it were an Individual Event, I would Surely Win" is too long. The readable limit is 35 characters.

>> No.3980  
File: 2014-08-03 07_43_26-A Kiss For The Petals - Maidens of Michael.png -(976686 B, 806x625) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
976686

I've done testing on medium-sized text and found that in order for them to wrap properly, there's a limit of 35 characters on the first line and 34 on the second and third lines. Unfortunately, ArcTool does not recognize this text size, and so they are not marked in the UTF files and are wrapped the same as normal-sized text. We will need to mark them manually for easier editing later.

To wrap them properly, you will need to override ArcTool's word wrapping routine by inserting a fullwidth space at the wrap point manually. Select the first 35 characters in a line after the 「, then move the cursor back to the last unbroken word and add spaces such that the next word starts on the 36th character. Between the last space and the next word at the 36th character, add a full-width space as in those written in the Japanese IME. Repeat for the remaining characters, but do so at the 34th character after the full-width space.

This line in s005 is written as:

- <5A9D> 「せんせいはよくても、わたしはダメなの。クラスのリーダーとして、そういうのは許せないのっ!!」=「That may be good enough for you,    but not for me!  As the class      queen, I refuse to allow it!!」
>> No.3981  

>>3977
I've changed this to "I Would Win Were it a Singles Event" which is exactly 35 characters.

I've also revised Miya's dialogue later in the chapter to match the new title.

I will keep the note about wrapping medium-sized text in mind as I go forward. So far there have only been a few places where it has occurred, and most of them are brief exclamations where wrapping would not be an issue.

>> No.3982  

>>3981
This line from the same file is also medium-size and too long:

- <5910> 「甘い、甘すぎよ、メープルシロップより甘すぎよっ!! そんなことじゃ、学年で一番優秀なクラスになれないでしょう?」=「You're just too  darn sweet!  You're sweeter than   maple syrup!!  Your class will never get to be the best like that, now will it?」
>> No.3983  

Chapter 9.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s009

>> No.4022  

Chapter 10.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s010

Maybe it's because translating is causing me to take more time going through this one compared to the previous games, but I feel like the relationship of the main characters is better developed in this one.

>> No.4023  

>>4022

I agree. In terms of character development, Miya and Risa had the best of it, imho. Meanwhile, this steady pace you're keeping is making me smile. Need to get my gears working soon too.

>> No.4027  

Chapter 11.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s011

I knew this game was significantly longer than the previous ones, but I was astonished to see by how much.
I referenced one of the scripts from a previous game earlier tonight and was shocked to see the entire game was only 15 files (granted, those files were each noticeably longer than the files have been for this game so far, but still...)

>> No.4034  

Chapter 12.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s012

This marks the 1/10th point...

>> No.4035  

>>4034
Holy shit dude you just finished 1/10th of the game in just a few days over a month? That is just fantastic!
Keep up the good work.

>> No.4043  

Chapter 13.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s013

>>4035
But that still means it will be 9 more months at this rate...

>> No.4048  

>>4043
A month ago it was a joke on /u/ that it would take ten years to finish. Now as long as no one dies in an accident it will be finished within the next year. Two years 0% done. One month 10% done. I am in the middle of making an alter to you. You keep this up I will sacrifice a lamb to you.

>> No.4049  

Chapter 14.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s014

>>4048
Well, I am going to be spending October, November, and December in Japan, so hopefully my plane won't crash in the ocean...

>> No.4050  

>>4049 Please don't jinx w

>> No.4055  

Chapter 15.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s015
There were a lot of instances of medium-sized text in this chapter. I tried to space them according to >>3980, but it's possible I may have messed some of them up.

>> No.4059  

Chapter 16.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s016

>> No.4095  

Chapter 17.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s017

I've thought of offering my personal impressions on the various chapters as I post them, but I don't want to give away spoilers.

>> No.4096  

>>4055
If possible, please upload save files from immediately before these lines so that I can examine them.

>> No.4100  
File: GAME19.txt -(214862 B, 0x0) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

>>4096
The attached save file begins at the first medium-sized text line for this chapter, which is

  • <6FE6> 「わぁ~、すっごく可愛いのばっかり!!」

There are then several that occur, some of which are dialogue, and some of which are narrative.

The last medium-sized text line for this chapter is
<A19E> 紗良さんと私、趣味が似ているかも……ああ、語り合いたいっ!!

>> No.4132  
File: 2014-08-31 03_02_31-A Kiss For The Petals - Maidens of Michael.png -(613567 B, 806x625) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
613567

>>4100
I'm having difficulty aligning these lines properly. I'm unsure what changed between the first instance of the medium-size text in s003 and what followed.

>> No.4133  
File: Capture.jpg -(327625 B, 1612x629) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
327625

>>4132
Assuming you're using the unaltered script from the wiki, the first line appears to wrap correctly into the second, but then there is a large gap being inserted somehow between the second "to" and "see" which is regular space in the script file.
It appears to occur at the 50th character of the line. The same thing can be seen in the screenshot posted in >>3980. The screenshot shows three spaces between "me!" and "And" even though only two are present in the script file. This also occurs at the 50th character of the line.

This may also be somehow related to the fact that in the original game, dialogue lines wrap differently from narrative lines, with additional spaces padding the start of each line of dialogue to align them past the quote bracket, whereas narrative lines have no such padding (see the attached image for a comparison).

>> No.4140  

Chapter 18.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s018

>> No.4163  

Chapter 19.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s019

This was a particularly long one. But then the next one is ridiculously short.

There was a lot of medium-sized text in this chapter as well.

>> No.4182  

>>4163
One thing that may be worth mentioning from this chapter is the phrase 裸の付き合い.
Everything I can find indicates that this phrase is used metaphorically, and the 裸 part doesn't mean actual nudity, but is symbolic of opening up your private self to someone.
However, in this chapter the characters seem to use it literally, without any hints of irony or indications that it's supposed to be a double entendre.
So in the case of the translation, I don't know if it's better to use a term like "bare" or "exposed" so that it keeps the double meaning of exposing oneself either physically or emotionally, or if I should translate it the way the characters seem to use it and interpret 裸 as literal nudity.

As of right now, I've kept the double meaning by translating it as "Baring everything," so that it could be interpreted as either opening up emotionally, or as exposing one's body.

>> No.4184  

Chapter 20.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s020

>> No.4187  

Thank you for all of your hard work!! I can't wait to see it when it's finished!

>> No.4213  

Chapter 21.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s021

I believe there may have been an error in this one.
<0FD2> 仕事はスピーディに進んでいき、その手際の良さに関心するくらい。
Given the context, it seems like 関心 should actually be 感心. I translated it accordingly, and also made a note in the script.

>> No.4240  

Chapter 22.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s022

>> No.4248  

Chapter 23.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s023

>> No.4251  

>>4182
I actually came across something I translated a number of years ago where I translated 裸の付き合い as "Naked fellowship." I think I may change this translation to match that.

I'm still open to suggestions though.

>> No.4256  

I'm in the middle of translating chapter 24, but there appears to be a large section of the script which does not appear in the game.

I thought it might have been related to the choices I had made up to that point (even though I was fairly certain I had made all "good" choices) but to be sure I replayed the entire game up to that point, once making all "bad" choices, and the second time making all "good" choices.

In both instances this section of the script did not appear in the game. Is it possible there's a problem with this script, or am I simply missing something?

The wiki page states "A branch at s024 allows the reader to choose one of six routes," but no matter which choices I make in the chapters prior to this, I am never presented with a choice in chapter 24.

>> No.4257  

I believe the choice the wiki mentions (which leads to the 18+ portions of the game) is locked on your first run. You need to make the following choices:
On your first go-through, select choices 1-1-1-1-2. Then restart and choose 1-1-1-2-1. You should now be able to select a route.

>> No.4259  

>>4257
So I have to play the game to completion before the other 5 routes are unlocked in chapter 24?

>> No.4263  

Specifically, you have to complete Risa X Miya route before you can choose a route, I believe.

>> No.4266  

>>4263
In that case, here s024 with the portion available on the first play through translated.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s024

I'll complete this script once the remaining portion becomes unlocked on my next play through.

>> No.4267  

Chapter 25.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s025

>> No.4268  

>>4266
best thing you can do i think is to set the game on skip mode and make all the good choices. you should unlock others then.

>> No.4269  

Chapter 26.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s026

As with chapter 24, there were two lines in this script which did not appear in my playthrough. I presume they'll show up when I select one of the other couples' routes on a subsequent playthrough. I've left them untranslated for now, until I revisit this scene again later.

>> No.4270  

Chapter 27.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s027

I have to say, I'm enjoying the pacing of this one. Out of all the other visual novels (with the possible exception of Eris and Shizuku's first appearance) this is the first to feel like an actual romance story to me.

>> No.4275  

Chapter 28.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s028

>> No.4278  

Chapter 29.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s029

>> No.4279  

http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s030

It appears only the first half of s030 occurs on the first playthrough. Based on the content of the script, the second half appears to be a completely different scenario, which I presume is presented on a second playthrough. It also appears the first "halfway end" in this chapter will not occur on the first playthrough, regardless of any of the prior choices made. I experimented once with all "good" choices, and once with a single "bad" choice, and both resulted in the same outcome in s030.

As with the other chapters, I'll complete the translation of this script when I return to it on a subsequent playthrough. If I still have difficulty unlocking this part of the script, I'll request help at that time.

>>4257
I'm not sure the choices you've provided here will result in a positive ending either time. They both seem to be a mixture of "good" and "bad" choices.

>> No.4280  

>>4279
Eh, I got 'em off of Listless Ink's SH page (I don't know a lick of Japanese). They seemed to work for the people on there, though.

>> No.4281  

By the way, is there any way I can assist you with your work? I can't translate, but I CAN edit the stuff you've done and make sure it's all in proper English.

>> No.4285  

>>4281
I certainly hope everything I've written is in proper English already, but I have no objections if you want to proofread for grammatical or spelling errors, or just to offer alternate suggestions if you find anything you think is worded clunkily.
For the most part though, I've been sure to choose the wording very carefully when writing the translations, so I would need a compelling reason to change anything I've already written.

>> No.4286  

>>4285
Gotcha. A question, though: judging by what I've read so far, you seem to have translated the text more or less literally, like the previous SH games. While this is the most accurate representation of what is actually being said, it makes for rather awkward English at times. Translating is an art in and of itself-- there's this compromise you have to make between faithfulness to the text itself, and faithfulness to the rhythms of the language you're translating to. Which of those is more important to you?

>> No.4287  

>>4286
Just as an example, I'm seeing a lot of lines that begin with a preposition. (e.g. "Sitting at my computer, I carefully phrased my comment.") I'm guessing that's a characteristic of the original Japanese, but it doesn't sound natural at all in English-- most people don't talk like that.

>> No.4289  

>>4287
Because those are narrative sentences?

I know some Japanese (still learning), certainly not at the level of Ralen, and his translation so far has not been literal in the least. You will notice right away if you can read the original text.

I personally did not see anything particularly awkward going through 29 translated chapters. I spotted a few spelling mistakes, but that's it.

>> No.4290  

>>4289
I get what you're saying, and I defer to Ralen on anything translation-wise. However, narrative or not, I think the narration is a bit too formal in English, especially coming out of the mouth of a high schooler. And anyway, the vast majority of narrative fiction is written in a conversational manner. The way the narration is done now seems kinda quaint to me.

>> No.4291  

>>4289
Please point out and/or correct the spelling mistakes in the wiki, if you would. I will need to update my local copies of the scripts as well.

>>4287
Anon is correct, instances such as these are done as a narrative convention, not out of faithfulness to the original sentence structure. I am by no means an expert in Japanese, but I have been translating long enough to know when rewording/paraphrasing/rewriting is necessary so that the text flows naturally in English.
Please also be aware that narrative text may follow different conventions and flow differently from spoken dialogue, because people don't write the same way they talk.

As a perfect example, the phrase "Please also be aware" is something I would almost certainly never utter when speaking out loud, but it's something I write quite often.

Actually, that whole last paragraph would have sounded completely different if I had been speaking it rather than writing it.

>> No.4292  

>>4291
Actually, I do speak the way I write, but I'm probably in the minority there. With that being said, I feel that there are some parts of the text that could be worded differently; but you're the boss.

>> No.4293  

>>4291
These are from s001 to s010.

--------s002

Don't be decieved by her looks though.
deceived

Immdiately, Nanami-san blushed bright red and shouted something.
Immediately

--------s003

「It appears to be a detached atlier.」
atelier

「An atlier? Up here?」
atelier

She wasn't wearing a uniform, so she was probably a a faculty member... But she was a stranger to me.
a not a a

Perhaps she knew what I was going through, becuase she smiled gently as she spoke.
because

--------s004

There appeared a distinct patern of me talking her into submission, and her becoming agitated in response.
pattern

--------s005

Everyone semed pretty disappointed they couldn't hear more, but soon they settled down and the lesson began as usual.
seemed

--------s008

Rena-sensei just keeps shoving all these things onto me... Oofh...
Oooh?

--------s010

I found myself looking up the staircase to the atleier.
atelier

「You seem faily unconcerned... However, the two of you have been selected.」
fairly

>> No.4297  

>>4293
Thank you, I've made these corrections in the wiki entries.

>--------s008
>Rena-sensei just keeps shoving all these things onto me... Oofh...

This one was actually intentional. It was supposed to be "Oof" but I felt the "h" at the end added a little more feeling to it.

Please let me know if you find any other mistakes.

The text editor I use to add the translations to the .UTF files doesn't have an integrated spellchecker, and for the first several chapters I was having difficulty getting my internet browser's spellchecker to engage when I would past the files into the wiki page. I eventually figured out the problem, although I never went back to re-review the earlier chapters.
The later chapters should hopefully have fewer errors though.

>> No.4307  

Chapter 31.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s031

This may be my last update for a little while, as I'm leaving for Japan on Sunday. I intend to continue my work on this as much as possible while I'm there, but it may take me several days to get settled.

>> No.4309  

>>4307
Have fun. You deserve a lot of it.

>>4297
As you said, I didn't really notice spelling mistakes in the later chapters; I'll post here if I find any more.

>> No.4312  

To whomever is making changes to the scripts in the wiki, I would appreciate it if you would post your suggested revisions here first, rather than just arbitrarily changing what I've written. In most cases I had a reason for using the phrasing I did, and I don't agree with most of the changes you've made.

It's not that I'm not open to suggestions, but I would appreciate discussing any changes before making them.

>> No.4314  

>>4312
Wow, this person was on a roll today. I just came home to find 15 more change notifications in my inbox.

A few of these changes I'm okay with, but most of them I'm not. I realized this is a "group effort" so to speak, but would it be okay to request that any changes to existing scripts be submitted and discussed in this thread before modifying the wiki? Typographical corrections not included.

To be truthful, I'm a little protective of my translations. It's not only a lot of hard work, but it's a creative effort on my part as well. Sometimes I'll agonize for 10-20 minutes over a single sentence just to make sure it sounds right. So I get a little upset when people start making random changes (like altering Miya's intentionally formal dialogue to sound more casual).

>> No.4316  

>>4314
I've changed the permissions on the Maidens of Michael tree so only a certain group can do edits there, so far only including ralen and axypb.

I can add anyone else who'd like to do proofreading/editing and has shown to play ball by discussing changes in this thread.

>> No.4317  

>>4316
Thank you, Phyis.

I've gone through and revised all the altered pages. I kept a handful of the changes, but must of them I ended up reverting.

>> No.4319  
File: s030.txt -(21276 B, 0x0) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

Sorry I wasn't aware that I must ask permission before editing the wiki. Didn't mean to step on anyone's toe, so my apology.

I just started playing Michael no Otome-tachi and thought it's an opportunity to help with translation. So I intent to check and translate the remaining MiyaRisa portion.

Outside of wordings (which if the initial translator insist on not changing then I don't mind), there were mistranslation corrections in what I did yesterday. So I'd appreciate if the initial translator give a look over again.

I have already translated the remaining portion of s030, posting here in the attachment since I can't edit the wiki anymore.

>> No.4322  

>>4319
I did find one or two places where you found mistakes with my translation, but some of your corrections were not actually correct.

For example, ううん does not mean "yes."
I also noted you changed what had been natural-sounding English dialogue in several places to stock-sounding overly literal translations.

For example, changing

>- <6DEC> 「でも……いきなりお風呂なんて……」

from

>「But... We're just going to drop everything and get in the tub?」

to

>「Having a bath this suddenly...?」

There were also grammatical issues in a number of the things you altered.

For example, changing

>- <17D41> 「それは……いえ、まだ全然です。今も悩んでいます」

from

>「Well, that's... It's not totally resolved. I've still got some problems.」

to

>「Well, that's... It's not totally resolved. I'm still troubled by it until now.」

I appreciate your willingness to help, and you did correct at least one error in the translation, so I don't mind you proofreading, but I've put enough work into this at this point that I'm not really comfortable just handing it off to you from here, especially given the level of your English ability. No offense intended, but you clearly seem like you're not a native English speaker.

I'm still getting settled at my place in Japan, but hopefully I should be able to resume my work translating this game in the next week or so. And of course, once I return from Japan I'll be able to resume at full capacity.

>> No.4323  

>>4322
There was one change which I reverted, but I'm not sure if my version is correct.
In s006:

>- <166A> 「でも住む世界も違うし、秘密の関係でもあったから、二人の仲はなかなか進展しなくて……周りのみんなはそんな二人が歯がゆくて、仕方なかったみたい」
>「But they both lived in different worlds...

This was changed to

>「But it was a different world back then...

I wasn't getting any indication of a then vs. now comparison from this sentence. It seemed to be saying to me that the two girls in question lived in different worlds from one another. I acknowledge that I could be wrong, though.

>> No.4324  
File: s032.txt -(21429 B, 0x0) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

>>4322
Indeed English isn't my native language. But I'm not a literal translation freak. I left the majority of your translation as is despite them not being literal.

Everything I decided to change was what I deemed straying too far from the original text, or difference in style. Opinions do differ, that's why I said above if the original translator insists on keeping anything regarding to wordings, go ahead.

So I supposed I can't work on the translation as you want to handle it. Here is s032 that I just did, might as well posting here.

>>4323
Yeah that one would need a third oppinion. I decided the sentence was referring to a homophobic world in the past instead of figurative music/dancing worlds because 1)Rena said it was Taisho/Showa period and 2)They kept their relationship a secret, unlike the girls in the current St. Michael's.

Some comments:
-these girls are fine ladies, they're not likely to say "oh man" so translating もう like that isn't appropriate.
-best couple Miya and Risa are voted by the 一年 not just their class. so it should be freshmen or freshman classes instead of freshman class to avoid misunderstanding.

>> No.4325  

>>4324
I appreciate your comments.

>I decided the sentence was referring to a homophobic world in the past instead of figurative music/dancing worlds

My interpretation wasn't that the difference was singing versus dancing, but rather they were from two different social classes. One being from a wealthy, well-known family, and the other being a relative nobody. And this difference in social standing was the reason they had to keep their relationship a secret.

>-these girls are fine ladies, they're not likely to say "oh man" so translating もう like that isn't appropriate.

I agree in the case of most of the generic background characters, because they do speak in a much more refined way. But I make an exception for characters like Eris, Reo, Mai, Nanami, or Risa, because the story makes a point of identifying these characters as being less refined or upper class (Reo may be upper class, but she certainly isn't refined). It's also clear from the Japanese dialogue that these characters speech patterns are more casual than their classmates'.
Although, characters like Mai and Risa revert to speaking more formally when addressing their superiors, whereas characters like Reo and Eris tend to be casual all the time.

>-best couple Miya and Risa are voted by the 一年 not just their class. so it should be freshmen or freshman classes instead of freshman class to avoid misunderstanding.

In English the phrase "freshman class" refers to all classes in the freshman year, collectively. You would not say "freshman classes" in that context, because it doesn't sound natural. "Freshman class" is understood to mean the entire first year.

>> No.4326  

>>4325
The background characters' polite speech had been expressed quite appropriately in your translation, so it's unncessary to go out of the way to make Risa more casual than she actually is. "Oh man" is a rather punky way of speech for a normal, domestic girl like Risa. Reo and Eris might use it, though, I agree.

Thank you for clarification on freshman class, though I still think it sounds more natural if changed to freshmen (she's popular among the freshmen, etc). Just saying.

>> No.4328  

s044 on the wiki only contains the middle portion of the actual s044 UTF file.

http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s044

>> No.4329  

I've added my translation for chapter 32 to the wiki.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s032

Suggestions are welcome, but I would ask that outside of pointing out translation errors, any suggestions on wording choice be limited to areas where you feel some nuance from the original text has not been properly conveyed.

>> No.4349  

Sorry for the long delay. I had a busy weekend in Nagoya.
Here's chapter 33.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s033

>> No.4350  

Soo, when you say "Translations", the only thing that comes to mind is I can play this in english. Is this a dead or alive project?

>> No.4351  

I have a question, what do you want to say in Scene 14, when Sara says "Gaede-han, wed go ob by bouf..."?

>> No.4352  

>>4350
It hasn't even been a week since the last update. This project is still very much alive. Due to its sheer size though, it will still be many months before it's complete.
Also, unfortunately, my recent schedule has not permitted me to spend much time on this, so I'm not making progress as quickly as I have been.

>>4351

>Gaede-han, wed go ob by bouf..."?

"Kaede-chan, let go of my mouth..."

>> No.4353  

>>4352
you are doing a great job as it is, take it easy :)

>> No.4354  
><41E1> 「なんて言うかな、美夜さん……吹きだしちゃったりして」=「I wonder what she'll say... I'll bet she blows a gasket.」

Here Risa said that she thinks Miya will burst out laughing, not getting angry. So the expression "blow a gasket" is incorrect.

>> No.4356  

<88D1> 「ええ。カップルで投票しないと、ダメなのかしら?」=「Yes. Must votes be cast by couple?」

"be cast for couple" not "by couple"

>> No.4357  
><0751> 個人戦ならわたくし、選ばれるのに=I Would Win Were it a Singles Event
><9483> 「そうよ。もし個人戦ならばきっと、わたくしが選ばれるのに」=「Indeed. I would surely win, were it a singles event.」

"was it" instead of "were it"

><B065> 「入らないわ、もう……ヘンなこと言わないで」=「Geeze, no they wouldn't... Don't be stupid.」

Using "stupid" here is too strong and unnessary localization, it's best to leave that to moments when she actually insult Miya. Just translate it as it is "No they wouldn't, geeze... Stop saying weird things."

>> No.4358  
><BC75> なんで? どうして??=But why? What was the reason?
><BCD8> 美夜ったら一体、何を考えているの?=And just what did Miya think of all this?

"But why? What was that for?"
"Just what the heck are you thinking, Miya?"

>> No.4359  
><0FED> そう声に出して言いたいけど、絶対に言えないジレンマ。=I wanted to voice that thought, my dilemma prevented me from doing it.

Missing "but" before "my dilemma"

>> No.4360  

>>4354
I had interpreted 吹き出す (literally "to blow off" or "release pressure") in the sense of releasing anger, but upon further research, I can't find this phrase used in that sense, so I'll change this.

>>4356
"By couple" sounds more natural than "for couple" here, and it seems clear to me from the context that she means each vote must be cast for a specific couple. If others also think the current wording is ambiguous I suppose I could change it to "per couple," but otherwise I'm going to leave it.

>>4357

>"was it" instead of "were it"

Although "were it" may not be technically correct grammatically, it sounds much more sophisticated and refined than "was it." So I'm leaving this one as well.

>Using "stupid" here is too strong and unnessary localization,

Again, this is one of those things where it's clear from the context and Risa's tone of voice that "stupid" is not meant as an insult. I suppose I could change it to "don't be silly" but I think that sounds too gentle for Risa's outward personality. I may revise this if others also feel that "stupid" is too harsh.

>>4358

>And just what did Miya think of all this?
>"Just what the heck are you thinking, Miya?"

I feel like these both essentially say the same thing, in that Risa is wondering what Miya's thoughts on the matter are.
I can concede that the current translation doesn't quite capture the same exasperated tone though, so I'm changing it to:
"Just what was going on in Miya's head?"

>> No.4361  
><326D> 確かに今にして思えば、いつも校内のあちこちで言い争っているとき、誰も入ってくることはなかったけれど。=Now that I thought about it, I don't think anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought.

"I didn't think"

>> No.4362  

>>4359
I've corrected this.

>>4361
The sentence begins with "Now" (present tense) so "I don't think" is correct here.

>> No.4363  
><1C11> 「もっとちゃんと褒めてよ、麻衣っ」=「Be a little less stingy with your with your praise, Mai!」

Remove one extra "with your"

>> No.4364  
><2FA6> でもエリスさまは完全に、興味なさそう。=But Eris didn't seem interested in the position at all.

"Eris-sama"

>> No.4365  
><52CD> 「わかった? それでは早速……スタート♪」=「Does everyone understand? In that case, get ready, and... Start♪」

"Got it now? In that case with no further delay... START♪"

The わかった was Mai talking to Reo, not everyone.

>> No.4367  
><5CF3> お遊びだからって、麻衣さまが某大学入試試験に出た問題を持ってきたっていうのに。=And Mai-sama said she had included questions from a certain university's entrance exam just for fun.

"Mai-sama even said she had included questions from a certain university's entrance exam just for fun, and yet..."

>> No.4368  

For liamgrbd:

RE:

><0751> 個人戦ならわたくし、選ばれるのに=I Would Win Were it a Singles Event
><9483> 「そうよ。もし個人戦ならばきっと、わたくしが選ばれるのに」=「Indeed. I would surely win, were it a singles event.」

"was it" instead of "were it"

>> "were it" is actually the grammatically correct usage for that statement precisely because of the way it was phrased. "Was" would be correct if, for instance, the script is changed to "If it was a singles event, I would surely win." However, while the latter statement sounds more efficient, it no longer effectively reflects the personality of Miya through her speech pattern, in my opinion.

----------

For Ralen:
I quite enjoy your translations, including your translations for the light and bonus novels, since you're able to retain the raw emotions in the romantic moments. I would just like to clarify something so I can understand it better. In s033 (In Risa's Room) the line below gives me two possible meanings:

<A339> 驚いたけれど、心のどこかでこうなるって、分かっていた。=It took me off guard, but somewhere deep down I knew this was where things were going.

Does "took me off guard", mean that Risa was on guard but Miya's kiss removed her inhibitions, in which case, "it took [her] off guard", or was she surprised by Miya's kiss, in which case, "It caught me off guard" might be a more appropriate expression.

Also, I second what anonymous said: take it easy. You're doing well with the translations in spite of your busy schedule and I'm sure many fans are grateful for all the effort you exert.

>> No.4369  
><5D8E> 美夜を見ると、まるで『当然でしょう』とでも言いたそうな顔をしている。=I looked at Miya, whose expression was clearly saying, "I told you so."

I looked at Miya, and there she was, donning a face that totally said "It is but a matter of course."

>> No.4370  
><6461> 「わたくしのことはいいのです、油断してしまった結果です。それよりもテスト中、エリスは寝てませんでしたか?」=「Don't concern yourself with me. It was simply a result of carelessness. And more importantly, did I see you sleeping during the test?」

"It was simply the result of my own negligence."

Shizuku is saying that she didn't ace the test because she's not that good, not saying it's because of her carelessness.

>> No.4371  

If you will please post the specific scripts each of these lines occurs in, it will make it easier to find and correct these.

>>4363
Corrected.

>>4364
Corrected.

>>4365

>The わかった was Mai talking to Reo, not everyone.

Corrected.

>>4367
I feel like this is fine as it is, but I added the word "even" to make it more clear.

>>4369
I feel that wording is clunky and awkward. I don't see any problems with what is currently written.
If a substantial number of other people disagree, I will look at rephrasing it.

>>4370

>Shizuku is saying that she didn't ace the test because she's not that good, not saying it's because of her carelessness.

If that's the case, then "negligence" is no better, since it means the same thing.
However, I disagree with your interpretation based on the meaning of 油断.
It seems to be saying the exact opposite of what you said. That Shizuku failed to get a perfect score not due to lack of knowledge, but due to a careless mistake.

>> No.4372  

>>4368
Thank you for clarifying this. I wasn't sure if "were" was actually correct in this instance, but I knew it sounded better (although I realize what sounds good is not always correct).

Thank you for the compliments. In answer to your question

><A339> 驚いたけれど、心のどこかでこうなるって、分かっていた。=It took me off guard, but somewhere deep down I knew this was where things were going.

The word here is 驚いた (odoroita - To be surprised) so the intended meaning is "It took me by surprise/caught me off guard." Not that it lowered her defenses. I can change this if people think it's too ambiguous currently.

>> No.4373  

>>4368

>You're doing well with the translations in spite of your busy schedule

As a point of interest, I don't know how many of you here follow AXYPB's SonoHana blog, but I had originally intended to make more headway with the translation yesterday since I had the day off, and had not made much progress during the past week.
However, I was unable to make as much progress as I wanted, because I attended Girls Love Fest 12, where I was able to meet and briefly speak with Anzu Hana (best known for performing the voice of Reo).

>> No.4374  
><519B> 「な、なによそれ、口説き文句でも言ってるつもり??」=「Wh- What the heck, is that your idea of sweet-talk?」

"Wh- What the heck, is that your idea of pick-up lines?"

Using "sweet-talk" here doesn't properly convey what Risa is actually saying. She's straight-out asking whether Miya is flirting with her, not flattering.

>> No.4375  

Thank you for the clarification. I'm still a beginner in Kanji so your explanation is really helpful.

With regard to changing the translation, I think if people are still able to get the correct sense of it, retaining it is a perfectly valid choice. Please just consider my question as a special case.

>> No.4377  

>>4371

>If you will please post the specific scripts each of these lines occurs in, it will make it easier to find and correct these.

Oh sorry. Sure I'll do that.

>If that's the case, then "negligence" is no better, since it means the same thing. However, I disagree with your interpretation based on the meaning of 油断. It seems to be saying the exact opposite of what you said. That Shizuku failed to get a perfect score not due to lack of knowledge, but due to a careless mistake.

Sorry, somehow I typed "neglience" instead of "neglect" (as in Shizuku chiding herself for not preparing herself well with university-stuff, even though of course that was unreasonable for a highschooler). But yeah, I can see now that maybe she meant it was just her carelessness.

>> No.4378  

>>4362
If so, then it should be "Now that I think about it" instead of "Now that I thought about it"

>> No.4379  

>>4360

>I had interpreted 吹き出す (literally "to blow off" or "release pressure") in the sense of releasing anger, but upon further research, I can't find this phrase used in that sense, so I'll change this.

You changed it into "she'll lose it" which is still an expression to describe anger, never humour. I'll have to be adamant about this one because it portrays Miya image in Risa's head. Miya has always been calmly teasing or laughing at her, never anger. (Which is why the impact of the first time Miya getting angry and looking at her with hatred later on will be very large)

>> No.4380  

>>4374

>She's straight-out asking whether Miya is flirting with her

The expression "sweet talk" in this context refers to flirtatious compliments. As in trying to hit on someone.

>>4378
The omitted verb here is "Have."
"Now that I thought about it..." = "Now that I've thought about it, I think..."
"Now that I think about it" would also be acceptable, but I don't see anything wrong with the way it currently is.

>>4379

>never humour.

This expression can sometimes describe humor as well. e.g. "I tried to keep a straight face, but I lost it and burst out laughing."

I will try to think of a way to rephrase this so that it's less ambiguous.

>> No.4381  

"She'll lose it" is fine since "it" can be interpreted as any state of emotion. The expression may be more often used by popular media to refer to anger, however, it is not limited to just anger. It can be losing one's temper, poise, current state of mind, etc.

Case-in-point: Notice in films when a character laughs hysterically in spite of him/her being known for his/her calm demeanor, the spectator(s) would usually comment "S/he's lost it", with "it" referring to the character's sanity.

>> No.4382  

s013

><5E2D> 「ええ。ああいう面倒なのは美夜さん、イヤなんでしょう?」=「Yeah, that. You got the worst of it in that mess. Didn't it irritate you?」

"Yeah, that. Don't you normally dislike that sort of troubles?"

Here Risa meant that Miya normally hates things like contest or dealing with people, not that Miya irriated by the outcome of the contest.

>>4380
I know "sweet-talk" can be flirtatious and not only platonic flattery, but it's ambiguous as it can be interpreted both ways. In that sentence, a normally bashful Risa is unambiguous asking if Risa is trying to pick her up (because obviously she thought that would make Miya coil away).

What is wrong with "burst out laughing" for 吹き出す? It is a dictionary translation too.

>> No.4383  

>>4381
As said, why go through the troubles of putting in ambiguous translation when there's a perfectly unambiguous, natural sounding alternative?

>> No.4384  

s013

><77DB> 「ど、どうせ、私の顔は恥ずかしいですよ……くぅ」=「So- So now I have an embarrassing face...?! Hnnh...」

"It- It's exactly because I am feeling embarrassed... Hnnh..."

>> No.4387  

s014

><A345> 「こ、この会話って……」=「Th- This discussion has really derailed...」

"Th- These conversations..."

Risa didn't say anything about derailness, it's possible that she had completely forgot about that and now solely amazed at the innuendo in the conversations around her. In cases like this, it's best to translate things as is.

>> No.4388  

s015

><08BA> 最初こそ話が脱線して、なかなか先に進まなかった会合だけど。=With the way the initial conversation had derailed, that hadn't been a very productive meeting.

"With the way the initial conversation had derailed, that should hadn't been a very productive meeting."

>> No.4389  

s015

><2855> 美夜のことが気になっていたけれど、そのまま慌ただしく教室を出て行った。=I was concerned about Miya, but I had already left the room in a hurry.

"I was concerned about Miya, but I still left the room in a hurry."

>> No.4390  

>>4382
I changed this to

>- <5E2D> 「ええ。ああいう面倒なのは美夜さん、イヤなんでしょう?」=「Yeah, that. Don't you normally hate getting mixed up in that sort of hassle?」

>I know "sweet-talk" can be flirtatious and not only platonic flattery, but it's ambiguous as it can be interpreted both ways
I don't really think it's ambiguous here. Based on the context, I feel that "sweet-talk" is obviously referring to flirtatious/romantic comments.
Again, if enough other people feel it is too vague, I'll try to think of a way to rephrase it.

>What is wrong with "burst out laughing" for 吹き出す? It is a dictionary translation too.

I think it sounds too sterile. It lacks Risa's personality.

>>4384

>- <7751> 「……だから、そんな顔しないで。恥ずかしいじゃない」=「...Please, don't make that face. It's embarrassing.」
>- <77DB> 「ど、どうせ、私の顔は恥ずかしいですよ……くぅ」=「So- So now I have an embarrassing face...?! Hnnh...」

Is this Miya saying Risa's expression is embarrassing, and Risa misinterpreting it as Miya saying Risa is the one who looks embarrassed?

>>4387
Because she doesn't say what specifically about the conversation she's thinking, and because I felt having it as simply "This conversation..." sounded odd and incomplete in English, I just used my best guess to fill in what she was probably thinking. Besides, she does say at the start of the next chapter that the conversation derailed.

It would be like translating the phrase それはちょっと… as "That's a little..."
Sure it sounds okay, I guess, but it sounds really stock translation-y, and there are better ways to express the same sentiment in English.

>>4388
I don't see any implication of "should" in this sentence. It sounds like she's flat out saying it wasn't productive.

>>4389
I changed this to

> <2855> 美夜のことが気になっていたけれど、そのまま慌ただしく教室を出て行った。=I was concerned about Miya, but I left the room in a hurry without stopping.
>> No.4391  

s017

><0FAC> 「美夜さん……やっぱり、来ていないのね」=「I was afraid Miya-san wouldn't show up...」

"Miya-san... really didn't show up huh..."

>> No.4392  

>>4391
This means the same thing.
It's like saying "I was afraid that would happen" (and it did).

>>4384

>- <7751> 「……だから、そんな顔しないで。恥ずかしいじゃない」=「...Please, don't make that face. It's embarrassing.」
>- <77DB> 「ど、どうせ、私の顔は恥ずかしいですよ……くぅ」=「So- So now I have an embarrassing face...?! Hnnh...」

My interpretation of this was that Risa was resignedly agreeing with Miya's assertion that she has an embarrassing face (which sounds like an insult, but Miya meant it positively).

>> No.4393  

I was merely clarifying your understanding of the expression because you seemed to have a finite interpretation of it, as seen from your explanation. Had you responded with "What is wrong with "burst out laughing" for 吹き出す? It is a dictionary translation too." earlier, I would not have had the urge to explain it further since you would have given a valid translation. I am by no means questioning your grasp of the English language in spite of your revelation in the beginning that it isn't your native language. It is also not my native language but, in my personal experience as an English teacher, when I know that my students need more explanation to expand their understanding of the language and its "oddities", I give them the means to improve their skills because I personally don't like it when they limit themselves.

As for your question "why go through the troubles of putting in ambiguous translation when there's a perfectly unambiguous, natural sounding alternative?" [sic], I believe my explanation of the expression should have been proof enough that it is not as ambiguous as you believed it to be because the context is clear. Honestly, they both sound "natural" to me. It's just that "burst out laughing" has a more spoon-fed feel to it because the reader is not given a choice of how to imagine the scene. I may be an English teacher but I, first and foremost, specialize in Literature, so I have a more fluid way of relating to language. I've also had experience in translating literary works from English to my native language and vice-versa and I find that choosing the most obvious translation isn't always the best choice. Either way, I don't mind at all whichever expression ends up in the final translation of this scene since they both express the same idea.

I hope that clears it up on my end.

>> No.4394  

>>4384
Based on my understanding of this line (that Risa appears to be frustratedly/resignedly agreeing with Miya's comment, as indicated by the どうせ at the beginning and the ですよ at the end) I've revised the line as follows.

  • <77DB> 「ど、どうせ、私の顔は恥ずかしいですよ……くぅ」=「W- Well I guess I just have an embarrassing face then! Hnnh...」
>> No.4395  

>>4392

>This means the same thing

The previous sentence was her being afraid that Miya wouldn't show up, and thus when she finally say it out loud, she confirmed the fact, not proposing yet another rheotical question.

>but I don't see anything wrong with the way it currently is

It's jarring, grammatically speaking, to have "Now that I thought about it, I don't...". I think it'd best if you can ask another native speaker who is well versed in grammar to recheck.

>>4390

>getting mixed up in these hassles

That's a very good one.

>I think it sounds too sterile. It lacks Risa's personality.

I don't feel so. Unless you can find another way to express a hysterical laugh unambiguously, "burst out laughing" is the most precise translation there. Something like "choke from laugh" maybe?

>>4393

>I believe my explanation of the expression should have been proof enough that it is not as ambiguous as you believed it to be because the context is clear

You must have not read the in-game context of the part we were discussing nor follow the discussion since the beginning. Ralen mistranslated the sentence as Risa thinking Miya will get angry ("blow a gasket"), when in fact, Risa thinks Miya will find it hilarious. In other words, the context is not clear, and thus a precise, correct translation must be given. He thus agreed to change it into something else, "lose it". You, he and me now know what exactly Risa mean, but the readers of this translation has no idea whether "lose it" here is getting angry or being overly amused. So I'm trying to ask if he can just use "burst out laughing".

I have also explained why I get very adamant about this point because there's a related plot point later on in the game.

>>4394
With どうせ (after all), Risa was saying that Miya is just stating the obvious. Miya said "don't make that face, it's embarrassing", Risa thought Miya was saying Risa's face is showing embarrassment thus replied "isn't that a matter of course? I -am- embarrased", which of course is a misunderstanding because Miya meant herself is getting embarrassed. Risa's tone of voice at that part is completely peaceful and agreeable, not sarcastic resignation at all.

>> No.4396  

s018

><3CBA> さっきまで、さんざん美夜に早く戻れとか、引き受けたなら責任をとれ――みたいなことを言っていたのに。=Not ten minutes ago I was admonishing Miya to come back, and to own up to her commitments.

"Not that long, I was admonishing Miya to come back and to own up to her commitments."

Using the "10 minutes" expression here is dangerous because it will be taken literally.

>> No.4398  

s018
<7BFB> 「私には、きっと無理よ……あの人の、娘なんだから」=「It's just not an option for me... Not with my parents.」
"I definitely will not... I'm the daughter of that person after all."

Risa is making a vow of not going to fall in love with a wrong person, and thus following up with this sentence. The later story made it clear that あの人 here is refering to her mother, not both parents.

>> No.4400  

s019

><2836> 「ん……美夜さんは、勉強しなくていいのかしら?」=「Hm...? Miya-san, are you sure you don't need to study?」

"Hm...? I wonder if Miya-san would be okay, not studying like that."

Yuuna is thinking this question to herself, not talking to Miya yet. Proof is Miya never reply to her, only talking to Risa.

>> No.4401  

>>4395

>The previous sentence was her being afraid that Miya wouldn't show up, and thus when she finally say it out loud, she confirmed the fact, not proposing yet another rheotical question.

This isn't a rhetorical question.

Although you're providing some valuable input, a good deal of your comments or suggested revisions are simply due to your lack of understanding of the nuances of the English language.

In this case in particular, saying "I was afraid that would happen" is a way of confirming that your fears have come true.

You see a small child carrying an over-filled glass of water, and they drop and spill it.
You respond by saying "I was afraid that would happen."

Risa sees that Miya is absent from class, and says "I was afraid she wouldn't show up."

>>4396

>Using the "10 minutes" expression here is dangerous because it will be taken literally.

Another case in point. The expression "10 minutes" to indicate a non-specific brief period of time is a common English idiom.

Even if it is taken literally, it's completely accurate in this sentence, because Risa literally moments earlier just came back from telling Miya to own up to her commitments and get back to work.

>>4384
I've changed this to

>- <77DB> 「ど、どうせ、私の顔は恥ずかしいですよ……くぅ」=「Y- Yeah, well, I'm embarrassed, all right? Hnnh...」

I still say that it's said with some resignation (in fact, I think resignation is the primary nuance behind the expression どうせ) but after listening to it again, I agree that it's not sarcastic.

>>4398
It was unclear to me whether this was meant to be plural or singular (referring to both parents or just one). I will still leave it as it is until I get further in the story and confirm for myself.

>>4400

>Yuuna is thinking this question to herself, not talking to Miya yet. Proof is Miya never reply to her, only talking to Risa.

I don't know if I agree with this interpretation. Both Yuuna and Miya are shown on screen at the same time, which implies Yuuna is speaking directly to her. The fact that Miya doesn't respond doesn't really mean anything, since she never talks to anyone besides Risa anyway.

>> No.4402  

s019

><14EF6> 「とにかく、ここは高等部のお姉さま方がたくさんいるんだから、瑠奈も失礼のないようにお手伝いしてね」=「Anyway, there are several older girls from the high school facility here, so try to make yourself useful without getting in the way.」

"Anyway, the girls here are all your seniors from the high school facility, so try to lend them a hand without being rude."

Takako is using a very gentle voice and facial expression here, one that made Runa calmly replies to, so I think the original translation was overly bossy/scolding.

>> No.4403  

>>4402
I agree with this point. I've modified the line.

>> No.4404  

s020

><582A> 「大切な身体だもの……風邪、ひかないでね」=「I wouldn't want your dear, sweet body... coming down with a cold.」

"to come down"

>> No.4405  
><5CC9> 「ダメ、今晩は眠れそうにないかも……」=「Darn... I don't think I'll be getting any sleep tonight...」

Different from Risa's normal speech, this sentence was spoken with a sweet voice and she's in a deeply romantic mood because of what just happened, so "darn" here is inappropriate for ダメ. "This is no good" would be better.

>> No.4406  

>>4404
Either is fine. I don't see any reason to change it.

>>4405
I chose "Darn" specifically because it sounds softer and less serious.
Also "no good" sounds too much like a literal stock translation.

>> No.4407  

s022

><7EE2> 「イヤ……じゃ、なかったのよ……」=「No... That isn't right...」

"I... didn't hate that..."

>> No.4408  

s022

><8792> お互いに、顔が赤くなってしまう。=Now both of our faces were flushed red.

Nothing wrong but here you're using past tense verb in a "Now" sentence as opposed to >>4361, so please uniform them either way.

>> No.4409  

>>4407
I've made this change.

>>4408
Both of those usages are consistent. They both use the word "Now" followed by a past tense verb to describe something that occurred at that particular time in the events being narrated.

"Now that I thought about it..." (the thinking is past tense because it took place in the events being described).
"Now our faces were flushed..." (the flushing is past tense because it took place in the events being described).

In the first case, where you seemed to have a problem with having both "thought" and "think" in the same sentence, although it would be correct to write "Now that I thought about it, I didn't think..." I made the second verb in the present tense because it sounds more natural.

Saying "Now that I thought about it, I didn't think..." just doesn't sound right somehow. I'm a native English speaker, but not a grammar professor. I know what sounds natural and what doesn't, but I can't always explain the reason why.

And on that note, I don't mean to be rude, but having seen your usage of grammar up to this point, I really don't think you have a deep enough understanding to be attempting to make grammatical corrections.

>> No.4410  

s019

><16427> 「ちょっと、そこのおねえさま」=「Hey, you over there.」

"Hey, the Onee-sama over there."

Runa later on refer to Risa as "Risa Onee-sama" too so I don't want to lose this in translation. "The Onee-sama over there" sounds adequatedly rude, yet still keep Runa's obligated politeness in the Japanese text.

>> No.4411  

>>4395

As a matter of fact, I HAVE followed your exchange, which is why I feel this is getting ridiculous. Ralen correctly interpreted the text but used "blow a gasket" incorrectly in his first translation. That is why, when you pointed it out and he realized his mistake, he agreed to change the expression.

What I don't understand is why you can neither see this nor let it go. There is more to translating that just knowing the language you're translating to and from. All the nuances of both languages must still be in play to make the translation more effective.

You want the translator to respect and go along with your translations and interpretations, but you refuse to back down when your suggestions are challenged. You have to learn to respect other people's interpretation too and not just force yours on them, because this micromanaging that you're doing IS forcing it (and also slowing the project down).

Apologies to everyone for straying from the project discussion.

Ralen, should you need assistance with editing or need a second opinion on grammatical usage, I'd be happy to help out. I will pop in and read the thread from time to time to check if there's anything I can assist you with. Best of luck.

>> No.4412  

>>4401

>Even if it is taken literally, it's completely accurate in this sentence, because Risa literally moments earlier just came back from telling Miya to own up to her commitments and get back to work.

It wasn't 10 minutes. They had come back for a good while and Miya had done a lot of works in that time, enough for Yuuna and Shizuku to praise her for being a big help. And yes I know "10 minutes" is an expression, I said so myself. What I'm not okay with is the high probability of people taking it literally.

>I don't know if I agree with this interpretation. Both Yuuna and Miya are shown on screen at the same time, which implies Yuuna is speaking directly to her. The fact that Miya doesn't respond doesn't really mean anything, since she never talks to anyone besides Risa anyway.

Miya always respond when people speak to her, espcially if it's a senior. She's antisocial and curt but strangely well-mannered in that aspect.

>>4406

>Either is fine

Shouldn't "want" go with "to do"? To use verb-ing it should be changed to something like "I don't want to see you coming down with a cold."

>>4409
Me not being a native speaker nor English professor doesn't mean I can't point out what feels wrong to me, given how I'm at least able to hold a decent conversation in English. Native speakers made lots of mistakes too, due to them being used to street (and grammatically incorrect) language. I have been pointing out other grammatical mistakes, which you did fix. Thus I would appreciate if we can continue with me simply pointing out possible mistakes, you taking a look, and we discussing. That's better than personal attacks.

Back to those two sentences, you said yourself that you aren't sure, so it's a good idea to have another native speaker to recheck.

>> No.4413  

>>4411

>Ralen correctly interpreted the text but used "blow a gasket" incorrectly in his first translation.

He said he couldn't find any instances where the Japaneses use the text to mean anger. So I'm pretty sure he incorrectly interpretted it.

>What I don't understand is why you can neither see this nor let it go.

I have explained why I must be adamant about this point: because it will affect a later plot point. (In Risa's head, Miya is always teasing and ridiculing her, so she can never imagine an angry Miya. Later on when they had a big fight regarding Miya's family matter, Risa was startled to find out that even Miya can get angry.)

>There is more to translating that just knowing the language you're translating to and from. All the nuances of both languages must still be in play to make the translation more effective.

Why do you think I do not understand this? Because he and I are getting into a discussion?

You seem to be insisting on the idea that I am nothing but demanding he must correct everything I say. Let me tell you there're near a dozen other points he refused to fix and I said nothing back. Why? Because I agree with his decision on those in the end. I only discuss on what he and I have yet to agree - which somehow seems to be the only things you see from our conversation.

>> No.4414  

>>4411
I would appreciate it if you could provide your input on the wording of "Now that I thought about it, I don't think anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought." in >>4361.
I think it sounds natural, but I can't figure out how to justify the usage of two different tenses in the same sentence.
The alternative would be "Now that I thought about it, I didn't think anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought," but that just sounds wrong somehow.

>>4412

>What I'm not okay with is the high probability of people taking it literally.

No one is going to take it literally, I promise you.

>Shouldn't "want" go with "to do"?

Like I said, either is acceptable.
"I wouldn't want you to come down with a cold."
"I wouldn't want you coming down with a cold" (You coming down with a cold is something I wouldn't want).

Another example:
"I wouldn't want you to go out of your way for me."
"I wouldn't want you going out of your way for me."

>That's better than personal attacks.

I never attacked you, but I am starting to lose patience with your nitpicking.
You have pointed out a few legitimate errors, and for that I'm grateful, but the vast majority of your suggestions are either pointless (they do nothing to improve or change the meaning of the sentence, it's simply you trying to impose your personal preference) or they're actually incorrect, and then we have to go into a lengthy grammar lesson just so you can understand.

I appreciate that you're trying to help, and again, I'm grateful for the legitimate mistakes in the translation that you've pointed out, but when you don't even have a firm grasp on English grammar yourself, you're really not qualified to be correcting anyone else's.
This isn't an attack, It's just the truth. As someone who is struggling to learn a second language myself (Japanese) I actually have a great deal of respect for you being able to speak English as well as you do. But regardless, it's obvious from the way you write that it isn't your first language. Just as you can't grade someone's calculus homework if you don't know calculus yourself, you can't tell someone how to make a sentence sound natural in English when you don't know yourself.

If you want to continue to review the translated chapters, you're more than welcome to, but I would ask you once again, as I did in >>4329, to please limit your comments to actual errors in the translation, or typographic errors.

>> No.4415  

s029

><20A7> 美夜は一瞬目を見開いて、そして複雑な表情をした後。=Miya's eyes opened wide for a moment, and then she gave me a confusing look.

"Miya's eyes opened wide for a moment, and then she made a complicated expression."

Clearer on "Miya is having an unreadable face" instead of "Miya is looking at me in confusion"

>> No.4416  

s031

><21FF> 「美夜……あのクリスマスのすごい告白は、一体何だったのよっ」=「Miya... What was the deal with that unbelievable Christmas confession?」

"Miya... What happened to that unbelievable Christmas confession of yours?"

Risa is questioning why Miya isn't contacting her despite being the one who confessed, not questioning why Miya confessed.

>> No.4418  

s032

><7D21> 二人もこっちに気付いたみたいで、エリスさまは声をかけながら手を振って、雫さまは穏やかに会釈をしてきた。=Apparently having noticed the two of us as well, Eris-sama called out and waved, while Shizuku-sama nodded quietly.

"while Shizuku-sama greeted us with a quiet bow"

><7E6F> なのでそのまま、私も会釈するだけにした。=And so, I settled for simply nodding back.

"And so, I settled for simply bowing back."

><8136> 先輩たちに挨拶する為に、一瞬離した手を、美夜はぎゅっと握ってくる。=I tightly took hold of Miya's hand, which I had let go of momentarily in order to go say high to our upperclassmen.

"Miya resumed her tight hold of my hand, which I had took back momentarily in order to properly greeted our upperclassmen."

>> No.4419  

>>4414

>I never attacked you, but I am starting to lose patience with your nitpicking.

You're just lost on perspective of things.

The amount of things I pointed out was in fact only about 10-15% of the total localization (i.e. non-literal translation) that you made on the script. This means that I agree with 85-90% of your decisions, and let me say that I really like many of the liberated expressions that you've put in your translation - they made the thing much more fun to read than my own boring translation. But you don't see that, and think I'm nitpicking on you for disagreeing on something. That's getting on my nerve as well.

You clearly made grammatical mistakes, typos, and mistranslations here and there - and so do I! What I pointed out are not ALWAYS CORRECT, but are not ALWAYS WRONG either. How am I supposed to know a grammatically questionable sentence is due to your typo, your carelessness, or due to my own lack of English understanding? Why is it that when I found your mistake, you would fix, but when I made my mistake you immediately insult my English? Can't you just explain your decision and move on to the next point instead?

I'm here to help getting the script right, not taking a shit on you or anything, so please stay on business. I'll keep pointing out what I feel is wrong - whether you decide to take a look or not, whether you decide to elaborate a discussion or not, will be up to you.

>> No.4420  

>>4418

>I tightly took hold of Miya's hand
>Miya resumed her tight hold of my hand

Although minor, this is an example of a genuine translation error.

>nodded
>bowed

This is clearly just nitpicking. I can't believe you honestly think this word choice makes a difference.

I also don't believe you can't tell the difference between the two types of corrections.

>>4415
A "confusing look" is not the same as a "confused look." If you genuinely don't know the difference between these two, you shouldn't be attempting revisions of this nature.

>>4416

>Risa is questioning why Miya isn't contacting her despite being the one who confessed, not questioning why Miya confessed.

This is not even correct. 一体何だった does not mean "what happened to" it means "what was the reason for" or "what was the situation regarding." If you do not understand the Japanese being used, you should not be attempting revisions of this nature either, or at the very least you should phrase your revisions as a question of "What does this mean?" rather than "This needs to be changed to..."

>Can't you just explain your decision and move on to the next point instead?

Out of five of your suggested revisions, only one was actually legitimate. And it has taken me now 45 minutes to respond to them all, time which, as I stated earlier, I simply do not have at the moment. Your efforts, although well intentioned, are doing more to impede the project at this point than help.

I do not want you to stop posting suggested corrections. I want you to know your own limitations and limit your suggestions to things that actually make a meaningful difference.

>> No.4421  

>>4414 Hi again. With regard to your concern, here is my suggestion:

"Now that I thought about it": there is an indication that the action of thinking has just transpired, bringing the past completed action in light of the present. I think this is the part that can be tinkered with.

"I don't think anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought" -> This is OK since the past action of people not disturbing Miya and Risa (past) continues to the present. It's like a habit of sorts so using the present tense is correct for "[don't] think".

To better express this statement in the correct tense, the two ways I can think of are:
"Now that I've thought about it, I don't think anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought" to show that Risa has finished thinking about the situation but that she just finished thinking now.

or

"Now that I think about it, I don't think anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought" to show that Risa is still processing the realization.

>> No.4422  

>>4421
Thank you for your input.

Verb tenses are tricky in this sort of story, because narration is typically done in past tense, but the narration appears to be a stream of thought conscious observation of the events as they occur, so present tense keeps wanting to slip in.

Here's what I'm trying to convey with the sentence.

"Now that I thought about it"
(i.e. I thought about it now, at this point in the events as they occured, but not necessarily now, in the present as I relay them)
"I don't think"
(I didn't think then, as it occurred, but also don't think now, as I relay this, since this fact continues to be true into the present)
"that anyone else ever came by any of the times Miya and I fought."

>Now that I've thought about it

I said something similar to this in one of my earlier attempts to explain my word choice in this sentence, but as you said, this carries the nuance that "Risa has finished thinking about the situation, but that she just finished thinking now."
Since the narration is past tense, I don't think this is appropriate. Just like you would write "Now that we'd gotten settled" instead of "Now that we've gotten settled."

>Now that I think about it

Likewise, I don't feel this is appropriate either, because as you said, it implies "that Risa is still processing the realization" which is also not what I'm trying to convey. I'm trying to convey that it was a sudden realization at the time, but it has since passed.

>> No.4423  

>>4422
It really is tricky. Right now, the only expression I can think of is "Come to think of it", which would show that it is something Risa realized after reflecting on past events.

>> No.4424  

>>4423
I guess the bigger question is, do you feel that the way it's currently worded is two jarring with the mixed tenses? That was what started this whole discussion in the first place was liamgrbd's assertion that this sounded unnatural, although I'm not sure that it does.

>> No.4425  

>>4424
Personally, I would go for either "Now that I think of it" or "Come to think of it", however, I have no problem understanding what is being said as you have phrased it. It sounds natural enough to me.

>> No.4426  

>>4424
Obviously that should have read "too jarring" and not "two jarring."

>>4425
I will change this to "Come to think of it."

>> No.4430  

Chapter 34.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s034

>> No.4433  

>>4430
Hi Ralen! Just a heads up for when you do a second pass on your translation. You forgot to add "sama" to Shizuku's name in the line below (Chapter 34)

<43F9> 「へっへっー、雫さまのもここにちゃんとあるわ。クラスの子がくれたんだぁ」=「Heh-heh... Naturally I've got one of Shizuku in here too. A girl in my class gave them to me.」

>> No.4434  

>>4433
Thanks for pointing this out. I've corrected it.

>> No.4453  

Hi, SonoHana is doing a twitter campaign right now. If we got 50,000 followers, they will make a new anime. More info here: http://t.co/u6IDyZocEQ

Sorry if it's OT, but we need the boost. Please spread the word.

>> No.4458  

I was a fool for thinking I could keep up the same pace of translating this while I was in Japan.
I've made some additional progress, but I haven't even had time to look at this in the past week and a half.

I'll continue to work on it as I'm able, but meaningful progress may not resume until January.

>> No.4459  

Take it your time. As long as you continue translating the game, I'm happy.

>> No.4460  

>>4458
again, take your time, don't rush it. you are doing a grate job as it is.

>> No.4461  

I'm sayin' the same thing: Take it your time. The progress already done is a very great job.

>> No.4464  

>>4459

>Take it your time.

>>4461

>Take it your time.

Did you copy and paste, or is that just a weird coincidence?

>> No.4465  

i think it supposed to be "take your time" not take it your time

>> No.4466  

>>4465
I know, but it's weird that two people wrote exactly the same thing.

>> No.4471  

>>4466
most likely same person, using different computer

>> No.4472  

>>4471
Mostly likely a different person, but English wasn't his first language so he copied and pasted what someone else said.

>> No.4484  

After nearly a month, I finally had some time to spend on this again, due mainly to this being the first Saturday I haven't gone somewhere (partly due to the rain and partly due to still getting over a cold from last weekend).

Here's chapter 35.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s035

>> No.4528  

I'm back from Japan, so hopefully progress on these should resume their previous pace before long. Maybe even faster, depending on how much I learned while I was gone...

http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s036

>> No.4530  

Chapter 37.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s037

>> No.4531  

The script is also mirrored on GitHub.
https://github.com/AXYPB/SH11

>> No.4543  

Chapter 38.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s038

>> No.4546  

Chapter 39.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s039

>> No.4557  

Chapter 40.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s040

>> No.4559  

Chapter 41.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s041

I forgot to mention, with chapter 40 complete, that's roughly 1/3rd of the total story.

On a similar but unrelated note, I noticed the other day that one of the background songs in this game reminds me an awful lot of "Adagio in D Minor," the theme to the science fiction movie Sunshine.

I found the song in the Extras menu today (if you click the left arrow, it's the very first one) and the title is 幻日 ("Parhelion") which seems like more than a coincidence.

Am I crazy, or does anyone else notice the resemblance as well?

>> No.4564  

Chapter 42 is complete, but I haven't been able to access the wiki to upload it since yesterday.

>> No.4565  

>>4564
There was a technical issue and I'm away this weekend, so I didn't notice. My apologies. It should work again.

>> No.4567  

>>4565
No worries.
Chapter 42.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s042

>> No.4571  

Chapter 43.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s043

>> No.4586  

Chapter 44.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s044

The last few lines of this are still untranslated, because they only occur during the midway end. I tried intentionally making a "wrong" choice at the branch before this, but still didn't get the midway end, so maybe it isn't possible on a first playthrough.

I also noticed a good portion of this script was missing from the original wiki page before I updated it.

>> No.4587  

Chapter 45.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s045

>> No.4595  

Chapter 46.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s046

>> No.4603  

Chapter 47 is done, but the wiki appears to be down again.

>> No.4604  

I've moved the wiki to another server, hope it'll prove more reliable.

>> No.4605  

>>4604
Thanks.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s047

>> No.4613  

Chapter 48.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s048

>> No.4614  

Chapter 49.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s049

>> No.4616  

Chapter 50.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s050

This completes the Risa/Miya storyline. The other character's paths, along with the two midway ends for the Risa/Miya path have now been unlocked. I'll go back and translate the missing portions of scripts 30 and 42 which are now available, before moving on to the other characters' stories.

I find it interesting that the player can't get any of the bad ends on their first playthrough.

>> No.4617  

>>4616
Congratulations and thank you very much for your work so far.

>> No.4621  

I've completed the outstanding portions of chapters 24 and 30, but I'm now getting a "502 Bad Gateway" error on the wiki.

>> No.4622  

>>4616
What I said about not being able to get either of the midway ends on the first playthrough may not be correct. It looks like it requires more than one bad choice to get the first midway end. I don't know exactly how many are necessary, or if they're weighted differently.

>> No.4624  

>>4621
Running again. I really have to check the nsfw board more often, sorry.

>> No.4625  

Chapters 24, 30, and 44 have had the missing portions completed.
Chapter 51 has also been completed.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s051

>> No.4626  

>>4625
I salut you! You doing a great job. How can I donate?

>> No.4632  

>>4626
I appreciate your support.
I don't know about donating...

Chapter 52.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s052

>> No.4633  

>>4626
In lieu of donating to a free fan translation effort, I advise you to support the producers of the original content. See this page for links to buy Fuguriya and Yurin Yurin's products using overseas credit cards: http://petalsgarden.axypb.net/buying-guide/

>> No.4634  

>>4633

I already bought sono hana vns I liked the most, so it's done. Thanks and keep up the good work guys!

>> No.4636  

spoiler
About this line:
「I'll be the reason Miya's always by herself... has something to do with her family situation she was telling me about yesterday.」
A think you wanted to put:
「I'll bet the reason Miya's always by herself... has something to do with her family situation she was telling me about yesterday.」

>> No.4637  

I mean in scene 46.

>> No.4638  

>>4636
Yes, I did. Thank you for pointing that out. I've corrected it in the wiki.

>> No.4639  

You forgot brackets in this line in scene 46: "I'm not letting you get away  Miya... Come back here!!". By the way, this isn't the first time it happens, but I just started reporting errors now.

>> No.4641  

>>4639
Thanks for pointing that out. Please let me know any other locations you've seen missing brackets.
Is it possible to search for these using some kind of regular expression? I'm not sure how to search for the absence of a character in a line.

>> No.4642  

I'm the anonymous of earlier.
I found all the lines with problems in brackets, I think. I use the regular expression (\- <.)(=「.), then replace all that lines with empty lines. Then, I search all the remainig lines with an "-" mark at the beggining and correct these.
scene 5
Lines: 37,71,206

scene 6
Line: 158

scene 11
Line: 101

scene 12
Line: 78

scene 17
Line: 55

scene 22
Line: 50

scene 26
Line: 78

scene 30
Line: 61

scene 32
Lines: 126,127

scene 35
Line: 96

scene 38
Line: 70

scene 44
Line: 24

scene 46
Line: 114

scene 50
Line: 109

scene 52
Line: 92

>> No.4643  

Sorry, the correct regular expression I used is (\- <.)(=「.*)

>> No.4644  

>>4642
Thank you. These have all been corrected.

>> No.4645  

More corrections in scene 46:
-Line 86: you forgot one more point at the end of the dialogue.
-Line 98: I think you want to put something before "and stifle me".
-Line 106: you forgot one more point at the end of the phrase.

>> No.4646  

Sorry, is in scene 47.

>> No.4647  

>>4645

>-Line 86: you forgot one more point at the end of the dialogue.

Corrected.

>-Line 98: I think you want to put something before "and stifle me".

This look all right to me. What were you thinking should be different?

>-Line 106: you forgot one more point at the end of the phrase.

There are already three dots at the end of this line.

>> No.4648  

Line 106: My bad, I didn't copy that dot.

Line 98: When it's says "Miya gave me a deep kiss to try", to try what?

>> No.4649  

>>4648

>Line 98: When it's says "Miya gave me a deep kiss to try", to try what?

"Miya gave me a deep kiss to try and stifle me."
To try and stifle her.

>> No.4653  

so i only made notes of glaring errors and i probably missed a bunch of things, its not a real proofread (though i could do a more rigorous one if that'd be helpful?) and i haven't gotten very far (stopped after script 020), i wanted to check in to make sure this is helpful/wanted as i know that you're keeping a tight rein on the translation

a ton of spacing errors both in scripts and in game, too many to list

a glitch where too much text/larger sized text will repeat the first letter of a line at the end from that point until a reload, probably an unresolved engine issue that can't be easily fixed.

script 009, line 2: should be 'nerve-wracking' instead of nervew-racking

script 020 is full of basic grammar mistakes re: comma placement
script 020, line 21: displays untranslated text
script 020, line 77: should be 'too scared' instead of to scared

>> No.4654  

>>4653

>a ton of spacing errors both in scripts and in game, too many to list
>a glitch where too much text/larger sized text will repeat the first letter of a line at the end from that point until a reload, probably an unresolved engine issue that can't be easily fixed.

These are due to limitations of our tools for this visual novel's engine, which are no longer in development. Our focus is to produce a complete translation first, coping with the limited engine as best as possible. It will be used with an eventual Ren'Py engine in progress here: http://nsfw.yuriproject.net/res/4064.html

>> No.4656  

>>4654

I should have investigated these two issues before mentioning them to be honest, as they were already addressed fairly early on this thread.

I'm more curious as to whether or not Ralen (and whoever else is working with them) would be interested in corrections at this point, or is that being saved for after translations are finished for final QC? I don't want to step on any toes or cause unnecessary slowdowns on the translation front (or post unwanted/non-useful material, for that matter)

>> No.4657  

>>4653

>script 009, line 2: should be 'nerve-wracking' instead of nervew-racking

I've corrected this.

>script 020 is full of basic grammar mistakes re: comma placement

I've reviewed the text of this chapter, but I don't see anything that looks particularly out of place or incorrect.

>script 020, line 21: displays untranslated text

Is this a software bug of some kind? The text looks fine in the script as far as I can tell.

>script 020, line 77: should be 'too scared' instead of to scared

I've corrected this.

I appreciate you reviewing the translation and pointing out any errors you may find. Everything you've found so far has been minor and easy to correct, so it's no cause for slowdown.

>> No.4660  

Chapter 53.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s053

Although this recounts the events from chapter 32 from an alternate point of view, the dialogue is different...

>> No.4661  

Scene 48:
Line 200: There is an empty space at the end of the line.

>> No.4662  

>>4661
I've corrected this.
I'm actually surprised there aren't a lot more of those. Putting a double space after a period is a hard habit to break.

>> No.4670  

Chapter 54.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s054

>> No.4679  

Chapter 55.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s055

>> No.4680  

Scene 50:
Line 65: You forgot one dot.
Line 109: You forgot the brackets.

>> No.4686  

>>4680
I added the missing period to the ellipsis on line 65.

Line 109 (line <878A>) already has brackets, though.

>> No.4687  

What strange. When you translate a chapter, I save it into a file, and in my file, that brackets are missing. Maybe you updated the translation later and fixed that error.

>> No.4688  

>>4687
It looks like you already pointed out that error in >>4642.

>> No.4689  

Oh... My bad xD

>> No.4692  

Chapter 56.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s056

This is the midway end for the Nanami and Yuuna route. It appears that at least more than one wrong choice along this route is required to get this ending.

>> No.4693  

Scene 24:
Line 71: You forgot the brackets.

>> No.4694  

>>4693
Corrected.

>> No.4695  

Hey guys I'm new to this but I downloaded ArcTool, so what can I do to help?

>> No.4697  

Chapter 57.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s057

>> No.4698  

Scene 52:
Line 92: You forgot the brackets.

>> No.4699  

>>4698
That one was also already corrected from >>4642.

Unfortunately I was very unproductive on this project last week. I'm hoping to do a little better this week, but I missed yesterday, so I'm off to a bad start already.

>> No.4700  

Chapter 58.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s058

>> No.4702  

Chapter 59.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s059

There are some really interesting CG images in this one.

>> No.4705  

Scene 54:
Line 95: You forgot the brackets.
Line 141: There are two empty spaces between the words.

>> No.4706  

>>4705
I've corrected the brackets.
The double space is because it's separating two sentences (even though "Ah!" isn't much of a sentence).

>> No.4711  

I apologize for the long delay. Here's chapter 60.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s060

This marks the approximate halfway point.

>> No.4712  

>>4711
Congratulations on translating 50% of the scripts.

>> No.4713  

>>4711
Yay! Good job!

>> No.4715  

Quick poll guys:
What gender are you?

>> No.4718  

Scene 37:
Lines 114 & 116: You write Pucchiko instead of Puchikko
Scene 57:
Line 49: You forgot the brackets.
And thanks for you great job.

>> No.4719  

>>4718
Thank you for your assistance proofreading.

>>4715
I'm male. Why do you ask?

Here's chapter 61.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s061

>> No.4721  

Chapter 62.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s062

>> No.4723  

Scene 58:
Line 18: You put onee-sama instead of Onee-sama.

>> No.4724  

>>4723
I already made that correction a few weeks ago.

>> No.4730  

s14, 1935: "Foll[o]wing that"

>> No.4731  

s14, A6FD, "I wasn't really sure how to handle to all this."

Redundant 'to'

>> No.4732  

s32, 2D46, 「Risa-san, are you all right? Honestly, and without even [an] apology... How rude.」

>> No.4733  

s40, A6C7, She never would have said something like that if [it] wasn't me.

>> No.4734  

>>4730
>>4731
>>4732
>>4733
Thanks for finding these. I've made the corrections.

>> No.4735  

s50, 3459, 「I see... It seems I my girlfriend knows me all too well.」
Redundant 'I'.

>> No.4738  

>>4735
Corrected.

>> No.4749  

Ralen, it's been a month since the last update, so I have to ask, are you ok, right?

>> No.4751  

>>4749
I'm all right, I just haven't had much free time to spend on translation in the past several weeks. I did a lot of catching up over the weekend, getting up to date on the Yuricycle web series, and the second New Generation web series. I'm attempting to keep up with the daily New Generation countdown videos as well. I'm hoping to be able to return my attention to this project shortly.

>> No.4754  

Chapter 63 is finally complete. I started on this chapter over a month ago... May was a busy month for me.
http://wiki.yuriproject.net/michael_no_otome_tachi:s063

>> No.4761  

Ralen, how will affect to you the decision of AXYPB of the leaves the actual proyects. You will continue the translations of this visual novel?

>> No.4762  

>>4761
I am dedicated to completing the translation of Maidens of Michael.
However, it will likely be several weeks before I'm able to resume progress. I've currently been contracted to complete another translation project, and therefore that one will take higher priority until it's finished.

>> No.4763  

I'm glad you planning on complete this transaltion. I don't mind how long it takes, I only want to see this titled translated. Thanks for responding and good luck with the another transaltion.

>> No.4779  

I would continue translation progress until you return, but I don't want any spoilers, sorry everyone, you will have to wait a little longer :/

>> No.4787  

I've resumed translating this title.

However, given the recent developments with licensing the series, I'm no longer going to upload the translated scripts, in order to avoid a potential conflict of interest.

I will continue to post my progress here, though. I completed chapter 64 tonight, which is the end of Nanami and Yuuna's route.

>> No.4788  

I'm happy of hear that you resumed the translation. By the way, you not going to upload the scripts in any page? I don't think there would be a problem for that, plus that way we cannot proof reading the translation.

>> No.4791  

>>4788
Now that it's been officially announced, I can reveal that the project I mentioned being contracted for in >>4762 is this.
http://mangagamer.org/sonohana/

Given my official involvement, it wouldn't be appropriate for me to continue to upload unofficial, unlicensed translations for the series.

The release of this first title is no guarantee the other titles in the series will be licensed as well, but positive sales of this title may improve the chances of that happening.

>> No.4794  

I understand you choice and I wish you the best. By the way, can you at least upload the last scene of the Nanami and Youna route that you already translate?

>> No.4795  

So, if i understand nobody will resume the translation of this game...Dammit! I want so badly playing this game but i can't read japness and Translation aggregator have strange translation...Did mangagamer (or another website) will translated this game?(I don't think so but by chance maybe...)
Well...thanks you for translated the commun route.

>> No.4796  

>>4794
I would like to do that, but in my current position, I don't think that would be wise.

>>4795
There are no guarantees, but if the sales of Remembering How We Met are good, then future releases may follow.

>> No.4797  

I've completed chapters 65 and 66.

>> No.4798  

>>4797
would it be possible for you to send these scripts to those who ask?

>> No.4799  

>>4798
I don't think that would be wise either.

My intent with posting my continued progress was to reassure fans that this is still being worked on, and ideally, an (official) translation may see the light of day.

But would it be preferable to just remain silent on my progress since I can't upload the chapters as I translate them?

>> No.4800  

I prefer you continue posting the progress. I guess is better than nothing, and I hope this translation see the light one day.

>> No.4801  

>>4799 Honestly I have no idea how to put these scripts onto the game, so you can trust me if you choose to send the completed scripts to my email. But if you don't I understand.

>> No.4810  

>>4799
What are the odds of Maidens of Michael getting localized anyways? Is it dependent on the sales of the one already getting localized?

>> No.4815  

>>4810
Sales are likely to be a factor, but outside of that, I couldn't tell you the likelihood.

Chapter 67 is done.

>> No.4819  

Is it dead or there is hope ?

>> No.4820  

>>4819
Just finished chapter 68, so far from dead.

>> No.4821  

Chapter 69 is done.

>> No.4822  

Chapter 70 is done.

>> No.4828  

Chapter 71 is done.

>> No.4829  

Chapter 72 is done.

>> No.4832  

Chapter 73 is done.

>> No.4835  

what are you planning to do after finishing the translation? keep them hoping that there will be an official release or make a patch? thanks for your work

>> No.4836  

>>4835
I will hold on to them as long as there's a chance of an official release.

>> No.4837  

Chapter 74 is done.

>> No.4839  

How can i use ArcTool? i don't understand anything, I never used this type of files :'( please help!

>> No.4843  

Chapter 75 is done.

>> No.4846  

Chapter 76 is done.

>> No.4847  

>>4846 if you're not gonna release the scripts then at least just release the final script for the nanami x yuuna route. Its the final one at least let us know how that one ended.

>> No.4848  

>>4846 if you're not gonna release the scripts then at least finish the nanami x yuuna route. Its the last script for that route at least show us how that ended

>> No.4849  

>>4847
>>4848
Sorry, given my current position, I don't think it's a good idea.

Chapter 77 is done.

>> No.4850  

>>4849 dude you've already almost finished that route. You're literally at the last one. Might as well finish it and not release the other scripts. Besides I doubt they'll care

>> No.4851  

Chapter 78 is done. This marks the end of the Kaede and Sara route.

>> No.4852  

His keep translating in order to have a chance to the novel see the ligth, so stop to ask him things so greedily.
By the way Ralen, thanks for continuing the translation.

>> No.4853  

>>4852 I'm not trying be greedy I'm just applying logic to this situation. If you've already gone as far into that route you might as well just release the final script just to let us know how it ends. Cause that actually makes sense.

>> No.4855  

>>4853
The logic of the situation is that I could get myself in trouble and potentially hinder future licensing efforts by posting unauthorized translations in my role as official translator for the series.

I can just tell you how Nanami's and Yuuna's route ends, though. Does this board support spoiler tags?

>> No.4856  

>>4855 that's perfectly fine too.

>> No.4857  
File: summary.txt -(357 B, 0x0) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

>>4856
All right, I don't think the board supports spoiler tags, so you can just click the attached text file to get a brief summary of the final chapter.
There's really isn't anything surprising in it, though. The conclusion was pretty much all laid out in the previous chapters.

>> No.4858  

>>4857 I actually wanted to know about the Yuri stuff that happens in the last script but whatever thanks anyways.

>> No.4859  

>>4858
There's no sex or anything, if that's what you mean. They just promise to be together forever, even when Yuuna graduates the following year.

>> No.4860  

Chapter 80 is done.

Chapter 79, too. I guess I forgot to post about that one.

>> No.4861  

Chapter 81 is done.

>> No.4863  

Chapter 82 is done.

>> No.4864  

How many chapters are there?

>> No.4865  

>>4864
120. Each chapter takes me roughly 2 nights on average, but I'm usually only able to translate about 4 nights per week.

>> No.4866  

Chapter 83 is done.

>> No.4870  

Chapter 84 is done.

>> No.4871  

>>4870

Hey Ralen, may I have some information please? >>4868 (In that thread so it doesn't clutter this one). Sorry to be a bother.

>> No.4877  

Chapter 85 is done.

>> No.4878  

wow,,counting the days already. Just got into this series last month and Im really happy to see you're still working on it. My gratitudes for your hard work.

>> No.4907  

After a brief hiatus due to the holidays and some other projects (namely the Revolution! web series) chapter 86 is now done.

>> No.4910  

Chapter 87 is done.

>> No.4912  

Chapter 88 is done.

>> No.4920  

Ralen,did you know if mangagamer will sell this game? I hope, i want this game so much! I wait for this translation before the translation begins(nice job btw). What are you gonna do if they don't? (sorry for english,is not my first language)

>> No.4925  

>>4920
AT this time, there's no official word on whether this title will be licensed or not, but I hope it will be someday.
I don't know what will become of my translation if it never gets licensed.

>> No.4926  

Chapter 89 is done.

>> No.4929  

Chapter 90 is done.

>> No.4930  

Chapter 91 is done.

>> No.4931  

what are you gonna do if mangagamer don't want it (the translation)? you wont give the translation i guess... That will be cool if you do it but i understand if you don't... Sorry to bother you but i really want to play this game. I wondering what happens in the route of Mai and Reo.(my favorite couple! It's why i want to play this game so badly!)
Thanks for your work (i check each week to see if the translation continue)(like a say before, english is not my first language so i hope you understand what i write)

>> No.4939  

Chapter 92 is done. This marks the end of the Mai and Reo route.

>>4931
If at some point in the future all options have been exhausted, and there is absolutely no chance of getting my translation released officially, then at that point I'll be willing to reconsider my options.

>> No.4943  

Chapter 93 is done.

>> No.4946  

>>4943
how many chapters are there?

>> No.4947  

There are a total of 120.

>> No.4948  

MangaGamer has opened their second annual licensing survey, I implore readers of this site to submit A Kiss For The Petals titles.
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1T2h8KPUsEvXlxYCDA_EdLOWTCu15b_P5LhL5FuF1LlM/viewform

>> No.4953  

>>4948
My recommendations for titles to request are, in order:

  • Maidens of Michael, my strongest recommendation and the direct sequel to Remembering How We Met as well as the largest title featuring the core St. Michael’s cast;
  • Any of Fuguriya’s releases, particularly the original A Kiss For The Petals, from which I believe later titles will naturally follow;
  • The New Generation, the first full-length release from St. Michael Girls’ School;
  • The Angel’s Longing, which features a more mature storyline.

Due to the difficulty and time required to acquire licenses for any visual novel, I do not recommend requesting products that follow any of the above titles until those are licensed and released first, which include Lovers of the Atelier, Snow White’s Knight, My Sworn Love For You, The Angels’ Spring Romance, The Angels’ Promise, and Revolution.

>> No.4954  

>>4953
So, basically don't request the 2nd or 3rd title in a series until we get the first one.

original A Kiss For The Petals
Maidens of Michael
Yuririn

Those are the three I put down. I think those 3 have the best chance of getting localized.

>> No.4955  

Dunno if you've gone over anything for mistakes since the scripts were updated for the final time on the wiki but I noticed a couple typos late on.

s043
<A408> kade-sama's
<B5D0> it would our first date
<C4F8> Nothing could be extravagant than this.

s044
<549A> 「The taste of my chocolates, combined with the chocolate your donuts, makes
<7BFD> Although we had each given chocolate one another chocolate...

s047
<315e> The mixture surprise and pleasure

s048
<4918> At first I couldn't but help be embarrassed -- (should be "couldn't help but be"?)
<6dbf> sounds of wet noises heavy breathing filled

>> No.4956  

>>4955
Thanks for pointing those out. A few had been corrected already, but several haven't.

>> No.4958  

I'm thinking about rereading it already (only finished 2 nights ago) cause it was so good, so if I do (probable) I'll make note of any typos I notice. I know there was one which I think was in the s20's but I forgot to note it. Got a feeling I noticed another too. Just in case they haven't been fixed yet.

Anyway, mostly wanted to say thank you so much for all the work you've done ★
I put my vote in for Michael no Otome-tachi in the survey too.

>> No.4959  

How many chapters are translated and how long will you translation next chapters?
PS. I m very gratefull for your hard work :D

>> No.4965  

>>4959
I've translated through chapter 93 out of 120.
The time I'm able to dedicate to translation is currently being taken up by another project, though, so I may not be able to return to this one for a while. I still intend to finish it, though, hopefully culminating with an official release someday.

>> No.4966  

I hope, you will have been ending by mai

>> No.4975  

Just dropping by to say thanks for your efforts so far. Just got into the series recently myself, and I'm looking forward to eventually seeing more of best girls.

>> No.4980  

>>4975
You're welcome. I hope to be able to return to this project in the near future.

>> No.4993  

Ok, finally re-read it over the past 10 days... (Just S001-050, of course)

Not sure if any of these were mentioned, didn't find them in the thread when searching.

S003
Line 5
「Haah, haah... Ahh, why did didn't my alarm go off, today of all days?!」
-Remove the did

S003
Line 178
I felt like she'd just read my mind, and went into a panic.
-Not an error really, but perhaps a little confusing? Maybe just put in "and I went"?

S005
Line 97
「Just what sort of relationship do those to have?」
-do those two

S005
Line 213
「With something this fun, it would be a tremendous missed opportunity not to take it big time. Do you all not agree?」
-Perhaps rephrase the last sentence? "Don't you all agree?" maybe?

S012
Line 101
Yuuna-sama appeared and plucked up the sheet paper.

  • sheet of paper?

Also there's a space between the = and Yuuna. Same thing in S006 Line 26, S007 Line 141, S014 Line 119, S033 Line 36 & S038 Line 145.

S015
Line 124
「Even if we head back to school now... we can probably won't be able to get much work done today.」
-remove the "can"

S025
Line 42
Immediately, the curtain raised, and the organ began to play.
-Just a suggestion, I think rose is the more correct word here, rather than raised

S036
Line 11
What's more, I wanted to things for her.
-to do things

S038
Line 137
「I'm afraid I can't be sure... But not to fear, I'll make it nice and clean.★」
-Another suggestion, "but fear not"?

S040
Line 5
I walked home again with Miya today.
-I think the position of "again" makes the sentence kind of... wrong.
I walked home with Miya again today.
Again, I walked home with Miya today.

S042
Line 179
「Mmh, Risa... More... Use your tongue as far it will go... chrp
-as far as it

S043
Line 89-91
「Yes... So we're agreed.」
「Right! We're in agreedment!!」
「What a strange way to phrase it... Hehe.」
-Not sure if agreedment (the d) is a typo or intentional. The line after is what makes me wonder since it could be that Risa pronounced it weirdly or that the line itself is a little odd (from her sudden surprise, which it is). Either way, just wanted to check since I don't know Japanese.

S044
Line 47
As soon as I placed one of them in my mouth, I was greeted by a creamy mouth feel and rich flavor.
-creamy mouth full?

S044
Line 76
Miya gnored the chocolate in my hand and gave me a kiss.
-ignored

S044
Line 150
...in the end, I was the only one to receive of any lovemaking.
-"to receive of any lovemaking." just sounds kind of awkward, though I don't know if it's actually wrong. Maybe "to be receiving of" but that still sounds weird :/

S047
Line 98
At that moment Miya gave me a deep kiss to try and stifle me.
-I know this came up earlier for a different reason, I think it should be "try to stifle" rather than "and".

Sorry about all the suggestion parts, I didn't want to leave so many... ;>_>

There were quite a few instances of "person and me" or "me and person" where I thought "shouldn't that be person and I?" but after looking it up I ended up getting a bit unsure.

>> No.4995  
>>I walked home again with Miya today.

>>-I think the position of "again" makes the sentence kind of... wrong.

Forgot my reasoning for this. Because it's emphasising that she walked home more than it is that she did so with Miya.

>> No.4997  

>>4993
Thanks a lot for helping find these. I've made most of the changes. A few of them had been corrected already.

>S044
>Line 47

This was actually supposed to be "mouthfeel" (should have been one word rather than two).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mouthfeel

>There were quite a few instances of "person and me" or "me and person" where I thought "shouldn't that be person and I?" but after looking it up I ended up getting a bit unsure.

There are many places where it should correctly be "person and I" but I intentionally made them grammatically incorrect to better reflect the way people actually talk.

>> No.4998  
>This was actually supposed to be "mouthfeel" (should have been one word rather than two).

Well, how about that? I didn't know about that so thanks.

As for the Person and I thing, I did think that for, say, Sara and Reo it felt natural and fitting. Started to wonder a little for Risa and Miya but perhaps. If it came from Yuuna or Shizuku I think it'd feel off since I'd expect them to be more proper though I can't remember it ever applying to them.
Anyway, totally understand you choice there.

Once again, thank you very much for all the work you've done, it's a pleasure to be able to read through it.

>> No.4999  

>>4998
Someone like Risa or Mai could go either way, but for characters like Yuuna, Miya, Shizuku, and to a lesser extent, Kaede, I try to keep things grammatically proper.

>> No.5009  

can someone tell me how to use the special build of ArcTool

>> No.5010  

can someone tell me how to use the ArcTool for
A Kiss for the Petals - Maidens of Michael.

>> No.5021  

I wondering when you will be able to return on this translation? I really want (need?) to play this game! I really love your work!

>> No.5022  

>>5021
I still plan to resume this translation, but it will probably be a number of months before I'm able to get back to it.

>> No.5045  

Hello dudes. When are you going to add another translations (chapters 64-120) on this page "http://wiki.yuriproject.net/wiki:michael_no_otome_tachi"? If i know chapter 93 is already translated.

>> No.5051  

Ralen, you are a superstar! My fingers are crossed for 94 and beyond; you're so close! Please keep us posted, mate. And thanks again for all your hard work!

>> No.5120  

Does someone know something about translation's continuation?

>> No.5122  

the day this gets translated is the day my life becomes complete.

>> No.5131  

OMG, i missed out the survey 'cause i've just known this site. What a shame. If Ralen don't get back yet, are there anyone go on translating it?
p/s : I'm really grateful for your hard work and hoping that someday it'll be finished

>> No.5133  

I think everyone who is on this forum should translate at least 3 chapters (from 64). If everyone do this, we can end this quite fast... I think so...

>> No.5139  

Dudes. If we won't do anything, we won't get translation... Who know when Ralen come back? Maybe after 1 year? Maybe 2? Or maybe he won't come back? I can help in translations but I need support.

>> No.5146  

I can provide support with patching and proofreading, but really can't help to translate.

>> No.5147  

http://www.mediafire.com/download/jjqme48nnq111n6/MSD.rar

here the like for a patch up to script 51 just replace the msd file

>> No.5148  

Thanks you but I have already read Kaede and Sara route and now I read Mai and Reo route but this take a lot of time.

>> No.5149  

How can I use ArcTool It says Unknown archive format please help

>> No.5150  

Dude. Anyone won't answer your question. I don't know why...xd

>> No.5151  
File: 1.png -(259796 B, 670x496) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
259796

you have the arctool then you open the game folder and go to the msd file
the go to HANAMIKA for sono hanabira 11 then hit ok
when you have the msd file open you go to [Batch] compile all files in this archive using string files from a directory

then it will put the tranlated files in to the game

>> No.5155  

it tells me that " No plugin can compile this kind of script" when compiling S001, what does it mean?

>> No.5156  

Now that the announcement has been officially made, I can reveal that my long hiatus from this project has been due to working on the MangaGamer release of A Kiss For The Petals - The New Generation, which is nearing completion.

https://twitter.com/MangaGamer/status/766708777437556736

Once work on The New Generation is complete, I intend to return to translating Maidens of Michael in the hopes that it too will get an official release, but at this point nothing is guaranteed.

>> No.5157  

So Ralen. Can you upload translated dialogues (chapters 64-93)?

>> No.5158  

yh plz

>> No.5159  

>>5157
Unfortunately, as I mentioned in >>4791, I can no longer upload my translations of these scripts due to my involvement in the official releases of this series.

Ideally, Maidens of Michael will one day be licensed, and my translations will finally see the light of day.

>> No.5160  

Ralen. How many chapters from "A Kiss For The Petals - The New Generation" must you translate and how long it take?

>> No.5161  

>>5160
You can keep up with progress updates by following MangaGamer's twitter.

>> No.5163  

how's the process going, Ralen? about new generation.

>> No.5164  

>>5163
I'm not sure how much I'm allowed to reveal about the project status. All I can say is watch MangaGamer's twitter feed or blog for updates.

>> No.5178  

So, now the New Generation is finished, you gonna work again in this translation?

>> No.5187  

>>5178
I've resumed work on this.
I've translated through chapter 96 as of tonight.
Hopefully this title will be licensed by MangaGamer one day, so that my translation can be released to the public.

>> No.5200  

Chapter 97 is done.

>> No.5203  

Where is the game file?

>> No.5204  

Chapter 98 is done.

>> No.5205  

Chapter 99 is done.

>> No.5207  

Awesome Ralen. Is good to know you're still working on this.

>> No.5210  

Chapter 100 is done.

>> No.5212  

Chapter 101 is done.

>> No.5217  

SO HAPPY you're still working in this.

>> No.5218  

Chapter 102 is done.

>> No.5219  

Chapter 103 is done.

>> No.5221  

>>5291 Do you not upload your translation scripts on the wiki? I was going to check them over but I can't load past 2014 of replies of the thread, so I'm not sure if you said anything about not uploading them or something.

>> No.5223  

Hinata, he said this:
"Given my official involvement, it wouldn't be appropriate for me to continue to upload unofficial, unlicensed translations for the series."

>> No.5224  

>>5223 Thanks! Finally able to load this thread.

Let's hope it gets licensed by someone then. Maidens of Michael is still the best SonoHana game for me by far. It would be saddening to not see it shared for the world to read.

>> No.5226  

Chapter 104 is done.

>> No.5229  

Chapter 105 is done.

>> No.5231  

Chapter 106 is done. This marks the end of the Shizuku and Eris route.

>> No.5238  

MangaGamer's 2017 licensing survey is open until Friday, 27 January. As with previous years, I implore readers to suggest A Kiss For The Petals - Maidens of Michael for localization, followed by other titles by Fuguriya.
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdyzlL5dYfJwRAuSfOl0koYZiz9KWyE0XRl3-fMRA2Fv6UwNg/viewform

>> No.5245  

>>5238
The survey will close today. Please submit an entry if you have yet to do so.

>> No.5254  

I forgot to update my status the past several days.
Chapters 106 through 109 are done.

>> No.5255  

Chapter 110 is done.

>> No.5257  

Chapter 111 is done.

>> No.5258  

Wow! So close! Keep up the good work.

>> No.5259  

Stay Determined! You're all most there!

>> No.5261  

yes yes yes yes I've been waiting for so long

>> No.5262  

Can someone upload dialogues from "Sono hanabira ni kuchizuke wo - Anata ni Chikau Ai" and (or) "Sono hanabira ni kuchizuke wo Revolution! - Rinagisa"??? I would be very grateful.

>> No.5263  

Any news about new sonohana game from mangagamer?
Found it annoying to see ''secret project'' in the result of the lincence survey but not sure if the game is one of the 6 secret project or not.Will probably don't have the answer (Secret mean secret after all) I will wait i guess...

>> No.5264  

Chapter 112 is done.

>> No.5267  

Chapter 113 is done.

>> No.5268  

Chapter 114 is done.

>> No.5269  

Chapter 115 is done.

>> No.5272  

Chapter 116 is done.

>> No.5273  

Chapter 117 is done.

>> No.5274  

Chapter 118 is done.

>> No.5275  

Chapter 119 is done.

>> No.5276  

Chapter 120 is done.
This marks the end of the Takako and Runa route, and the end of the game.

Unfortunately, I can't make any predictions at this time as to when this might see a release.

>> No.5277  

It's been nearly 3 years, but it's finally complete. Thank you so much Ralen for not giving up on this project. I hope we can enjoy the game in a near future. My best regards to you.

>> No.5278  

You're doing god's work. Thank you so much. I'll take the fact that's you're saying "when" and not "if" as good news

>> No.5279  

Finally! Thank you for your great work! Any hint about being on mangagamer?

>> No.5280  

Congrat for completion, i was the one maintaining the VNDB entry of this translation and i am so happy it has been completed. So, which one's the next to be translated after this one. The following one about nurse or later entry which are sequel of this one ? Will you continue to translate those other sonohana or are you going to simply do it for mangagamer in the future ?

>> No.5281  

Can someone upload dialogues from "Sono hanabira ni kuchizuke wo - Anata ni Chikau Ai", "Sono hanabira ni kuchizuke wo Revolution! - Rinagisa", and "Sono hanabira ni kuchizuke wo - Tenshi no yakusoku" or tell me how can i get this??? I would be very grateful.

>> No.5282  
File: tumblr_onqjy9Yx3j1uqf4gco1_1280[1].png -(780839 B, 965x917) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
780839

Against all odds, A Kiss For The Petals has been announced for release on Steam. Order today.
http://store.steampowered.com/app/397270/

>> No.5283  

Eh? The link is for the game A Kiss For The Petals – Remembering How We Met. The new was deleted maybe?

>> No.5284  

Jaja, april's fool. That wasn't funny.

>> No.5286  

God bless you.

>> No.5287  

>>5282
This image was a falsehood created for April Fool's Day and was not intended to incite speculation on an actual Steam publication. Such a release would not be possible, short of perhaps miraculous intervention.

>> No.5288  

So is there any way I could play the game now, like how I did last year with Sono Hanabira 10, or do I have to wait for an official release?

And if I can play it now, is it worth it? Or can I just wait a little for the official thing?

>> No.5298  

how to run the translation into game

>> No.5299  

even after finishing the translation why arnt they releasing it... please i have been waiting for months now... common

>> No.5301  

Still no news?

>> No.5304  

i've known your work since june last year and still hoped it be done and now it's done finally, i hope you be able to release it one day earliest! you are our savior, Ralen!

>> No.5305  

If the translations are finished, you can just post their scripts here Ralen.

>> No.5306  

>>5305
He will not.
Read this >>4787

>> No.5307  

https://twitter.com/MangaGamer/status/896185605213868032
It finally happened!

I wonder: Did anybody here work on it in an official capacity?

>> No.5308  

Congrats Ralen!

>> No.5309  

so is Ralen going to work on Lovers of the Atelier next

>> No.5310  

>>5309
I hope so.

>> No.5311  

Can't wait for the release. Thanks for the hard work.

>> No.5312  

Hope My Sworn love for you is translated next.

BTW mangagamer guys sure are taking their time releasing Maidens of Michael.

>> No.5319  

So, it's almost Xmas, 2018's right at our door. What's the situation ? Stuck at Editing, TLC, reinsertion (if any) or at QC to see if anything's missing. Which quarter can we expect the final release ? Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall or 2019 ?

>> No.5323  

look at this update

>> No.5324  

https://twitter.com/MangaGamer/status/951971398108540929

>> No.5328  

Good news.

>> No.5329  

https://twitter.com/MangaGamer/status/957312812153540608



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